Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates the number of occupations in Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, retail and helathcare sectors reached at the highest number of jobs in 2020 whereas manufacturing is slightly lower than these two sector in that following year. On the other hand, agriculture has the lowest job in 2020.

With regards to the employments in retail and healthcare sectors, both of them increased gradually over these 60 years. In 1960, retail field had 6 million jobs and it reached 16 million in 2020. Similarly, there was around 2 million job holders in healthcare sector which rose steadily and became 16 million in 2020.

On the other hand, manufacturing field had 15 million work which fluctuated in these 60 years and became around 13 million in 2020. In addition, agricultural sector had jobs above than 5 million and it decreased significantly over the years. In 2020, the figure reached a low of around 3 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features of the four sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided in the second paragraph, highlighting the highest and lowest sectors in 2020. However, there are some minor data inaccuracies when compared to the visual data. For instance, the student states that the agricultural figure reached 'a low of around 3 million' in 2020, whereas the graph shows it at approximately 2 million. Similarly, manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980, which is omitted, and the student's description of manufacturing fluctuating before becoming 'around 13 million' is generally correct. Key comparisons are made, but tighter precision with data points would elevate this. Band 6.5 is appropriate for addressing all parts with minor data inaccuracies and a slightly underdeveloped overview.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is logically organized with a clear overall progression. It begins with an introduction and overview, moves into the rising sectors (retail and healthcare), and finishes with the declining or fluctuating sectors (manufacturing and agriculture). Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different ideas. Cohesive devices are employed to link sentences and paragraphs, such as 'Overall', 'With regards to', 'Similarly', and 'On the other hand'. However, referencing and transitions are at times a bit mechanical, and spelling errors like 'helathcare' slightly disrupt the flow. Overall, the logical structure and clear progression satisfy the Band 6 descriptors well.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items and sector-specific terminology such as 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare'. There are several vocabulary and collocation errors, such as 'occupations' instead of 'jobs', 'reached at the highest number', and 'job holders' instead of 'jobs' or 'employees'. Spelling mistakes also occur, such as 'helathcare'. While these errors do not impede communication, they restrict the lexical score to Band 6, as the vocabulary use lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating relative clauses and time-reference prepositional phrases. There are several grammatical and mechanical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('retail field had 6 million jobs and it reached', 'agriculture has the lowest job'), awkward phrasing ('there was around 2 million job holders'), and missing pluralization ('lowest job', '15 million work'). However, these errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear. This profile aligns well with the Band 6 descriptor, featuring a mix of sentence forms alongside persistent grammatical errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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