Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The Graph in the following passage give us the intel about the job market in The United States of America from 1960s to 2020. The Graph ellaborate the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy. The fours sectors include Manufacturing, Retail , Agriculture and Healthcare.

Over the period of 1960 till 2020 these sectors played a major role in the economy of US by giving jobs to the people and also helping the economy as well.

In the start of 1960 the Manufacturing sector was on top with providing around 15 million jobs to the people where on the second place is a draw of Retail and Agriculture sector providing above 5 millions jobs and on the least number of jobs in the start was the healthcare sector.

During the time of 1980 the Manufacturing sector was on its peak with 20 million jobs along with that the Retail sector started to emerge with providing 10 million jobs, and on the the third was the least expected the healthcare sectore suddenly takes a boom and by the span of 20 years nearly double the number of jobs in their sector to 5 million jobs. and in the 1980 the Agriculture started to decline from 6-7 million to its double defecit.

In 2000s to 2020 Manufacturing job sector is at a decline, where on top are the two sectors Retail and Healthcare who boomed exponentially over the span of decades and are at the first especially the Health care sector, moreover Agriculture sector graph shows continous decline over this period not showing any boom or variations.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors shown in the graph and attempts to report main features and comparisons, satisfying the basic requirements of Task 1. However, there are significant inaccuracies in reporting data. For instance, the student states that in 1980 Agriculture started to decline from 6-7 million, whereas the graph shows it at around 3 million in 1980 (having declined from 6 million in 1960). Furthermore, some descriptions are vague or lack specific precision, such as referring to a 'double deficit' which does not accurately reflect the visual data. The overview is somewhat weak, lacking a clear synthesis of the overall trends at the beginning or end of the text. Overall, it addresses the task partially due to data misinterpretations, placing it at Band 5.5.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the paragraphing is awkward; for example, the introduction bleeds into unnecessary background commentary, and the body paragraphs are dense and hard to follow chronologically. Cohesive devices are repetitive and sometimes inaccurate ('where on the second place is a draw', 'and along with that', 'and on the the third was the least expected'). There is a lack of smooth progression between ideas, and referencing is occasionally confusing, making the flow somewhat mechanical and disjointed. Although there is a discernible overall structure attempting to move from 1960 to 2000-2020, the poor logical transitions and mechanical cohesive devices limit the coherence, warranting a Band 5.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'exponentially', 'emerge', and 'sector', but these are often accompanied by awkward collocations or lexical errors ('gives us the intel', 'ellaborate', 'sectore', 'double defecit'). Word choice is frequently informal or imprecise for an Academic task. Spelling errors ('ellaborate', 'sectore', 'defecit', 'continous') and repetitive phrasing ('providing around', 'number of jobs') constrain the lexical range. While the vocabulary is adequate to convey basic concepts about the chart, the frequent lexical inaccuracies and limited flexibility restrict the score to a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The text displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures frequently result in faulty grammar and awkward syntax (e.g., 'In the start of 1960 the Manufacturing sector was on top with providing around 15 million jobs to the people where on the second place is a draw of Retail...'). There are frequent errors in tense consistency, prepositions, and punctuation. For example, 'takes a boom' mixes tenses inappropriately within a past-time context. While basic meaning is usually retrievable, grammatical errors are frequent and cause strain for the reader, placing this response firmly at Band 5.0.

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