Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
the graph discussed the number of jobs discussed in US between 1960 and 2020 of four sectors of economy.
overall, only manufacturing increased in the year of 1980 but had downfall in 2020 where as other sectors also had fluctuated result over years.
healthcare and agriculture started from 3 and 6 million respectively in 1960 and over 2020 health raised with 5 million in 1980, 11 million at 2000 and in 2020 it got end at 16 million where as agrculture went down at 4 million in 1980 and 2000 continiously and saw other downfall in 2020 by 3 million.
other two, retail and maufacturing both rose with progress. retail started with 6 million and went up by 10 million in 1980, then in 2000 at 15 million and finally was at 16 million. manufacturing was at the top begining from 15 million in 1960 then 29 million in
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response is 149 words, falling just short of the 150-word minimum, and breaks off mid-sentence at the end ("then 29 million in"), which negatively impacts task fulfillment. Furthermore, the content contains factual errors regarding the data: the student states that manufacturing was the only sector to increase in 1980 (whereas retail and healthcare also rose), and writes 29 million for manufacturing in 2000/2020, which contradicts the graph where it peaks at 20 million in 1980 before declining. While an overview is attempted and some trends are mentioned, the inaccuracies and incomplete ending pull the score down to Band 4.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response is divided into brief paragraphs, but the overall structure is disrupted by the abrupt ending. Cohesive devices are basic and repetitive, such as "where as", "then", and "other two". Paragraphing is attempted to separate different sectors, but the logical progression is weakened by confusing referencing and inaccurate data reporting. Overall cohesion is mechanical and the text does not flow smoothly.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with several errors in word choice and form, such as "downfall" instead of "drop" or "decline", "health raised" instead of "healthcare rose", and "agrculture" misspelled. The student attempts some less common vocabulary related to economic sectors and trends, but frequent inaccuracies in collocation and spelling limit the score to Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, mostly relying on simple or poorly linked clauses. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing articles, incorrect prepositions, and misuse of tense or voice ("the graph discussed", "had fluctuated result over years", "got end at"). The response also terminates abruptly without completing the final sentence, which impacts grammatical completeness.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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