Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The lin egraph illustrated the number of employments in four departments of the economy in the US namely manufacturing, retails, agriculture, and healthcare between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that retails and healthcare provide more jobs over the period. Retails and healthcare consistently recorded incresed in all years, while, agriculture despite being the lowest figure experienced the most dramatic decline by the end of the timeline.

In 1960, manufacturing stood at the highest number of jobs, at 15 millions jobs, and this figure rose steadily reaching at 20 millions jobs by 1980. Then they dropped consistently and reached at around 14 millions jobs by 2020. Heatlhcare also showed a gradual decrease, declined from roughly 6 millions jobs to around 4 millions jobs over the twenty years, although it remained constant by the end of 2000, than flactuated slightly in 2020.

Reatils stood at roughly 6 millions jobs at 1960, it increased sharply to 10 millions jobs at 1980, 15 millions jobs at 2000 and remained incresed at 2020. While the job opprtunities in healthcare sector stood at 2 millions at 1960, it rose consistently over all the period and meet the lines with retails at the end of 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The student attempts to cover all sectors presented in the graph over the specified period from 1960 to 2020. An overview is provided, noting that retail and healthcare provided more jobs overall, while agriculture experienced a decline. However, there are significant factual inaccuracies in reporting the data. For instance, the student states that healthcare 'declined from roughly 6 millions jobs to around 4 millions jobs over the twenty years,' which misreads the trend, as healthcare actually rose from 2 millions to 5 millions between 1960 and 1980. Furthermore, manufacturing in 1960 is correctly identified at 15 million, but subsequent details contain confusion regarding years and figures. Because of these noticeable misinterpretations of the visual data, the response only partially achieves the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is divided into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and separate body paragraphs focusing on specific economic sectors. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'Overall,' 'In 1960,' and 'While.' However, the progression is sometimes hindered by unclear referencing and mechanical transitions. For example, the sentence 'Then they dropped consistently' creates ambiguity regarding the pronoun referent. Paragraphing is attempted appropriately to group distinct concepts, but overall cohesion is disrupted by the inaccuracies in data presentation.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting appropriate topic-specific terminology such as 'manufacturing,' 'agriculture,' 'healthcare,' and 'economy.' However, there are numerous spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, including 'lin egraph,' 'employments,' 'retails' instead of retail, 'incresed,' 'Heatlhcare,' 'flactuated,' and 'opprtunities.' These errors reflect a limited control of word formation and spelling, occasionally causing slight strain for the reader, which places this aspect firmly in the mid-range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures such as time clauses and contrastive connectors ('while agriculture despite being the lowest figure...'). However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors in verb tense consistency, prepositions, and article usage, such as 'reaching at 20 millions jobs' and 'stood at roughly 6 millions jobs at 1960.' Pluralisation errors are also common, such as 'millions jobs.' While these errors rarely completely impede communication, their frequency prevents the writer from achieving a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.