Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph below illustrates, number of jobs in four economy sectors in US between [redacted phone]. Mainly focusing on the fields of manufacturing, healthcare, retail and agriculture.
While looking into the data, it shows increased number of jobs in retail and healthcare sector over the time. Number of jobs in agriculture and manufacturing field declines from the year 1960 to 2020.
In US, there were 15 million jobs for people in agriculture field in 1960 that counts for the highest number among other four sectors. This number declines subsequently and marks the number of almost 13 million jobs availability in the year 2020. In contrast, healthcare job number was lowest among other sectors (around 3 million) in the year 1960 and then it gains spike in the coming years and hit the numer of 16 million by the year 2020.
Furthermore, data shows same number of jobs around 6 million in the year 1960 for both retail and agriculture field. Although their number shifts over the period of time, opportunities in the field of retail increases over time while those in agriculture drops significantly.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The student attempts to address all parts of the task, providing an overview and selecting main features such as the upward trends in retail and healthcare and downward trends in agriculture and manufacturing. However, there are significant factual errors in reading the data. For instance, the student states that agriculture in 1960 had 15 million jobs and 'counts for the highest number among other four sectors', whereas manufacturing was actually at 15 million as well, and agriculture started at 6 million according to the visual data (it appears the student confused the 1960 manufacturing figure with agriculture). Furthermore, the student claims retail and agriculture both had 6 million jobs in 1960, which is correct for agriculture and retail, but later contradicts data points. These data inaccuracies prevent the response from achieving a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has an identifiable structure with a basic introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding summary. However, paragraphing is fragmented, and cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty (e.g., 'While looking into the data, it shows...', 'Furthermore, data shows same number...'). The progression of ideas lacks smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs, making the overall flow somewhat disjointed. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as shifting abruptly between sectors without clear logical signposting.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using terms related to economic sectors ('manufacturing', 'healthcare', 'retail', 'agriculture') and trend verbs ('declines', 'increases', 'drops'). However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'economy sectors' instead of 'economic sectors', 'increased number' instead of 'an increasing number', and 'gains spike' instead of 'experiences a spike' or 'surges'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but lexical control is limited by frequent awkward phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'While looking into the data, it shows...' and 'In US, there were 15 million jobs...'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors including missing articles (e.g., 'in US' instead of 'in the US', 'healthcare job number was lowest' instead of 'the healthcare job number'), incorrect preposition use, and tense inconsistencies. These errors occasionally cause strain for the reader, though communication is generally maintained.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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