Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
the line graph illustrates the information about the jobs in four major sectors namely manufacturing, retaill, agriculture and healthcare in the US, over a 60-years period starting in 1960.
Overall, the manufacturing sector has the highest number of jobs , whereas the agriculture sector has the lowest than all others. There are dramtic changes in the retail and healthcare as they surged from very low to highest and equal at the end.
In 1960, the manufacturing sector had 15 million jobs and hit the peak of 20 millions in the next two decades before decreasing moderately till 2020. Agriculture and retail both sectors had 6 millions at the starting but part ways significantly as the retail become the sector with highest number of jobs along with health and agriculture end up as a sector with the lowest number of jobs. Health was the only department with the highest increase in the number of jobs from 2 million to 16 million in the end. At some point in 1975 both health and agriculture had 4 millions jobs, similarly as in 2020 both health and retail had 16 million and in 2008 manufacturing and retail too.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response successfully covers all major parts of the task by selecting, reporting, and comparing the key features of the four economic sectors over the given timeframe. The overview effectively captures the overall dominance of manufacturing initially and the dramatic transformation seen in retail and healthcare. Key data points, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million and peaking at 20 million, and healthcare climbing from 2 million to 16 million, are accurately cited. Although the student mentions some specific intersection points (e.g., in 1975 or 2008) not strictly visible on the prompt's main gridlines, the general trends and comparisons are well-developed and fulfil the requirements of an Academic Task 1 response.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The report displays a generally clear overall progression, divided into an introductory paragraph with an overview, followed by a body paragraph detailing specific trends and data points. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'whereas', 'both sectors', and 'in the next two decades'. However, paragraphing is somewhat compressed, with the entire body of data crammed into a single large paragraph rather than being logically split by time period or sector grouping. Additionally, referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as 'Agriculture and retail both sectors had 6 millions at the starting but part ways significantly', which creates slight mechanical friction.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for describing graphical data, utilizing terms such as 'surged', 'decreasing moderately', 'peak', and 'sector'. However, there are noticeable lexical and spelling inaccuracies throughout the text, including 'retaill' (retail), 'dramtic' (dramatic), and awkward phrasing like 'part ways significantly' and 'health and agriculture end up as a sector'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with mixed success. While communication is not impeded, the presence of these errors prevents the lexical score from reaching higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and coordinate structures. There are several grammatical errors and awkward expressions, such as 'illustrates the information about the jobs in' (unnecessary prepositional clutter), 'the agriculture sector has the lowest than all others' (incorrect comparative form), and plural/singular inconsistencies like '20 millions' and '4 millions jobs'. Punctuation is also occasionally careless with spaced commas. Nevertheless, the meaning remains clear throughout, placing the performance securely in the band 6 category.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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