Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The bar chart compares the number of jobs of the economy in four different sector (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare) between 1960 to 2020 in America.

Overall,it is clear that, retail and healthcare categories,the economy rapidly increased by the year, where in the othere two sector maufacturing and agriculture the number of jobs has been decreasing by the year.

In 1960, the economy of retail and healthcare, number of jobs starting between 0 to 5 and after there is massive increment has been shown by the end of year in 2020 was the highest and they meet together at the point which is nearby 15 millions of jobs.

Where, in manufacturing, at starting 15 miliions jobs and its goes up, and after 1980

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The candidate attempts to address the task by describing trends in four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, the response has two critical issues: first, it misidentifies the visual format as a bar chart instead of a line graph; second, it cuts off mid-sentence in the final paragraph, resulting in an unfinished response that is significantly under the 150-word minimum (containing only 122 words). While an overall trend is attempted, key data points are vague or inaccurate, such as stating that retail and healthcare started between 0 and 5 and met at 15 millions. Due to the incomplete nature of the writing and failure to meet the word count, the task is only partially addressed, earning a Band 4.5.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The text is organized into short paragraphs, including an introduction and an overall overview. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. Expressions such as 'where in the othere two sector maufacturing and agriculture' and 'Where, in manufacturing, at starting...' demonstrate poor logical linking between clauses. Furthermore, the abrupt cutoff at the end of the text severely disrupts the progression of ideas. While paragraphing is attempted, referencing is unclear and organizational control is weak overall, placing this criterion at Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with noticeable errors in word choice and morphology. For instance, the candidate uses 'sector' instead of 'sectors', 'othere' instead of 'other', and 'increment' where 'increase' or 'growth' would be more natural. Phrases like 'massive increment has been shown' lack idiomatic collocation. Although the names of the economic sectors are correctly reproduced from the prompt, the limited range and frequent lexical inaccuracies restrict the score to Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response features a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. Sentences often lack essential verbs or have broken syntax, such as 'the economy of retail and healthcare, number of jobs starting between 0 to 5 and after there is massive increment...' There are frequent errors in prepositions, tenses, and sentence boundaries, which can cause difficulty for the reader. Because the text ends abruptly with an incomplete sentence, grammatical control is severely undermined, resulting in a Band 4.5.

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