Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph provides information about number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US during the years 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it is clear that healthcare rose the most in six decades along with retail. Although, agricultural jobs declined over the years, manufacturing declined the most after agriculture.
In 1960, manufacturing provided 15 million jobs making it the highest contributor of the economy. While, healthcare was the lowest provider of jobs in the year. By 2020, we can see a major shift in the contributions as over the years healthcare observed a steep rise and it overtook manufacturing, which declined over the years.
Retail and agriculture both sectors provided 6 million jobs in 1960 but gradually as years move forward, retail sector increased the number of jobs and by 2020 it gave same amount of jobs as healthcare. However, agriculture declined and became the lowest job provider
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student has successfully covered all four economic sectors shown in the graph over the specified period from 1960 to 2020. An overview is provided in the second paragraph, highlighting the main trends such as the significant rise in healthcare and retail, alongside the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. Key data points are correctly cited, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million in 1960 and healthcare overtaking it by 2020. However, the statement that 'manufacturing declined the most after agriculture' is factually inaccurate according to the graph, as manufacturing actually rose to 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million, whereas agriculture experienced a steady and more straightforward drop. Additionally, some comparisons lack precision. Nevertheless, the main features are adequately reported, satisfying the core requirements of Task Achievement at a Band 6.0 level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response is organized into four distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs focusing on different sectors. This provides a clear overall structure. However, cohesive devices and transitions are sometimes clumsy or repetitive, such as 'Although, agricultural jobs declined over the years' starting a sentence awkwardly with a subordinating conjunction, and repetitive use of phrases like 'over the years' and 'in the years'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas, but logical progression within sentences could be smoother. Referencing is generally clear, but mechanical links place the coherence at a solid Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range suitable for describing trends, utilizing terms such as 'contributor', 'major shift', 'steep rise', and 'overtook'. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, but these are occasionally paired with unnatural phrasing, such as 'highest contributor of the economy' instead of 'largest sector in the economy', and 'gave same amount of jobs' instead of 'provided the same number of jobs'. Word choice and collocation errors are present, but they do not impede communication. Spelling and word formation are generally accurate, placing the lexical resource clearly within Band 6.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and subordinate clauses (e.g., 'which declined over the years', 'making it the highest contributor'). However, there are noticeable grammatical errors and awkward punctuation, such as missing articles ('number of jobs', 'retail sector increased') and fragmenting sentences with incorrect comma usage ('While, healthcare was the lowest provider'). Despite these errors, meaning is rarely obscured, and communication remains clear. The grammatical control is representative of a Band 6.0 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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