Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrates changes in number of people employed in four different economic sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020, namely manufaturing,retail, agriculture and healthcare.
Overall, retail and healthcare sectors inceased siggnificantly over ther period while agriculture showed steady decline. Manufaturing sector followed a fluctuating trend rising initially before experinecing continious fall.
Manufaturing sector had 15 million jobs in 1960 which increased to 20 million in 1980. After that it showed steady decline with 17M in 2000 and 14M in 2020. Only 3M people were employed in 1960 in healthcare which continued to rose to 5M in 1980. After 2 decades the employment surged to 11M and in 2020 it was 16M.
6M employers were working in retail and agriculture sectors in 1960. The number of people rose to 10M in retail after 2 decades and fell to 3M in agriculture. In 2000, the the workers increased to 15M in retail sector which was ssurged to 16M in 2020. In agriculture,number of employed people were unchanged in 2000 and fell to 2M in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features, trends, and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided in the second paragraph, highlighting the upward trends in retail and healthcare alongside the decline in agriculture and the fluctuating pattern in manufacturing. Data points are generally accurate and supported by figures from the graph, such as the peak of manufacturing at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare reaching 16 million in 2020. There are a few minor numerical discrepancies, such as stating 14 million instead of approximately 13 million for manufacturing in 2020, but these do not detract from the overall quality of reporting. The response meets all requirements for Task Achievement at a Band 7 level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response is logically organized with a clear overall progression. It begins with an introductory statement and an overview, followed by body paragraphs grouping the data logically. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different sectors and trends. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as 'Overall', 'After that', and 'In 2000', although there are some minor mechanical errors in linking and sentence transitions. Referencing is generally clear, though occasional awkward phrasing creates slight pauses in reading comprehension. Overall, the organization meets the criteria for Band 6.5, leaning towards Band 7 for its clear structure and logical flow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, incorporating terms like 'fluctuating trend', 'surge', and 'steady decline'. However, there are numerous spelling and word-form errors throughout the text, including 'manufaturing' instead of manufacturing, 'retail,' (missing space after punctuation), 'inceased' instead of increased, 'siggnificantly', 'ther' instead of their, 'experinecing', 'continious', 'rose' instead of rise, 'ssurged', and 'employers' instead of employees. These lexical errors indicate a lack of careful proofreading, though communication is rarely impeded. This performance aligns with the Band 6 descriptors for lexical resource.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as introductory prepositional phrases and subordinate clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are several noticeable errors, including missing articles ('changes in number', 'in healthcare'), incorrect prepositions or verb forms ('continued to rose', 'number of employed people were unchanged'), and punctuation errors like missing spaces after commas. Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout the response, fitting the Band 6 descriptor where simple and complex forms are mixed with occasional errors that do not impede communication.
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