Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrates the information about number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the graph shows comparison of the number of jobs in four sectors of ecomony such as manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare.
The number of jobs for healthcare and retail go hand in hand in rising trend starting from 3 million and 6 millions in 1960 and reached upto 16 millions in 2020. Whereas, manufacture shows rising trend uptill 1980 and after that it shows a gradual decline from 2000 to 2020.
While agriculture shows the declining trend from 1960 than it become contant in 1980 uptill 2000 and than it shows a gradual decrease in 2020.
In conclusion, the number of jobs for healthcare and retail shows a rising trend while agriculture shows the declining trend wheras manufacture first rise and than shows a declining trend also.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The student attempts to address the task by reporting on the number of jobs across all four sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are notable inaccuracies in reading the data. For instance, the response states that healthcare and retail started from '3 million and 6 millions in 1960 and reached upto 16 millions', whereas healthcare actually started much lower at around 2 million in 1960. Additionally, the description of agricultural trends ('become contant in 1980 uptill 2000') is somewhat imprecise. While an overview is present, it is repetitive and lacks depth. Overall, the response covers all parts of the task but suffers from data inaccuracies and under-developed details, placing it firmly at a band 5.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The text is organized into four separate paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which provides a basic structural framework. However, the logical progression is hindered by repetitive phrasing and poor paragraphing choices, such as the overly brief conclusion that merely restates the introduction and first body paragraph. Cohesive devices are used mechanically and sometimes incorrectly, such as 'Whereas, manufacture shows' and 'While agriculture shows the declining trend from 1960 than it become contant'. Pronoun referencing and linking words are basic and sometimes faulty, resulting in a choppy and disjointed reading experience. This demonstrates characteristics of a band 5.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The lexical range is limited and adequate only for basic communication. The student repeats common vocabulary items frequently, such as 'rising trend', 'declining trend', and 'number of jobs'. There are several spelling and word choice errors, including 'ecomony' instead of economy, 'uptill' instead of until, 'contant' instead of constant, and 'wheras' instead of whereas. Furthermore, 'manufacture' is used as a noun where 'manufacturing' is required. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the general idea of the graph, the numerous lexical errors and lack of sophisticated phrasing prevent the response from achieving a higher band, making 5.0 an appropriate score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as using 'whereas' and 'while' clauses. However, control over grammar and punctuation is weak, leading to frequent errors. Examples include missing articles ('The graph illustrates information about number of jobs'), tense inconsistencies ('manufacture shows rising trend'), and punctuation issues. Many sentences contain structural awkwardness, such as 'Whereas, manufacture shows rising trend uptill 1980 and after that it shows a gradual decline'. These errors frequently cause strain for the reader, aligning the grammar score with band 5.0.
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