Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph shows detailed comparison among four different job categories since 1960 to 2020. These categories include manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. As the graph shows, the manufacturing category plays a significant role in building the economy. Although there is significant boom of jobs from 1960 to 1980, yet the decline may observed after 1980 and in 2020, the category's contribution comes to less than 15 million. The similar declining pattern is observed in agricultural jobs. In 1960, about more than 5 million jobs play part in the economy, but with time it decreases to almost 2.5 million in number.

Here the inclining pattern is observed in the categories of retail and healthcare. Healthcare starts by a number of 2.5 million jobs in 1960 whereas retail starts from more than 5 million jobs contributing to the US economy. They both stand to equal number of almost 15.2 million jobs now in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four sectors over the 60-year period. You correctly identify the peak and subsequent decline in manufacturing, the steady downward trend in agriculture, and the upward trajectories of retail and healthcare, noting their convergence around 2020. An overview is present, and key figures (such as starting and ending points) are generally accurate and supported by the visual data. However, the overview could be more explicitly highlighted at the beginning or end of the response, and certain figures like the 1960 agricultural numbers could be slightly more precise. Overall, the content covers the required task adequately and fulfils the expectations for this band level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement and logical progression, moving systematically from a general introduction to decreasing categories (manufacturing and agriculture) and then increasing categories (retail and healthcare). Cohesive devices such as 'Although', 'As the graph shows', and 'whereas' are used to connect ideas, though some transitions feel slightly mechanical or abrupt. Paragraphing is present, separating the declining sectors from the growing ones, which helps readability. However, referencing could be smoother, and paragraph division is somewhat minimal, as the entire body of information is split into only two dense paragraphs. Better internal referencing and paragraph structuring would enhance cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, attempting less common items and descriptive verbs/nouns such as 'significant boom', 'declining pattern', 'inclining pattern', and 'contribution'. There are some successful word choices, but also minor inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'decline may observed' (missing auxiliary verb) and 'jobs play part in the economy'. Spelling is generally accurate, and the lexical range is sufficient to communicate the main trends clearly, even if the phrasing occasionally lacks natural collocation or precision compared to higher band descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating subordinating clauses like 'Although there is significant boom...' and 'whereas retail starts from...'. However, there are several noticeable grammatical errors and awkward structures, such as 'the decline may observed' (passive voice error), 'jobs play part' (missing article), and tense inconsistencies between past and present when describing historical data ('starts', 'stand'). Punctuation is generally fine, but the grammatical inaccuracies occasionally disrupt fluency, placing the writing firmly in the Band 6 category where simple and complex structures are mixed with recurring errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.