Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph shows the number of jobs in four distinct sectors of the economy in the US over the period, [redacted phone]. The sectors include manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare.

Overall, since 1960, manufacturing sectors was popular among jobs, which constituted 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980, although it decreased considerably by 2020. An increasingly rise was recorded for healthcare and retail sectors, rising gradually from 1960, and reaching highest figure by 2020. While, a substantial decline was accounted for agriculture throughout the same period.

Initially, a considerably highest number of jobs was allocated to manufacturing, which remained growing from [redacted phone], however, it reduced significantly and fell to 13 millions by 2020. Morever, retail sectors was accounted for the significant growth from 6 millions to 16 millions over the period, followed by healthcare from 2 millions to 16 millions as well.

In contrast, while the other sectors represented a considerably steady rise,agriculture followed an opposite trend. A gradual decline was recorded for agricultual jobs which dropped from 6 millions to 2 millions from [redacted phone].

In summary, manufacturacting was quite popular among jobs until 1980, although it dropped later by 2020, followed by agriculture, which followed a gradual decline over the same period. Healthcare and retail were the only ones which experienced a gradual increase from [redacted phone]

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student successfully covers all four economic sectors shown in the graph and provides a clear overview highlighting the key trends, such as the initial growth and subsequent decline of manufacturing alongside the steady rise of healthcare and retail. Comparisons are appropriately made between the categories across the given timeframe. However, the student's overview incorrectly states the time period as 1960-2000 instead of 1960-2020, and there are minor inaccuracies in some data reporting (for instance, stating that retail and healthcare reached 16 million by 2020 when retail was actually around 16 million and healthcare also 16 million, though the text slightly blurs the individual trajectories). Despite these minor lapses, the main features are sufficiently selected and reported, meeting the expectations for a Band 6.5 to 7.0 task response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response is logically organised into five paragraphs, featuring a clear introduction, an overall trend summary, two body paragraphs examining specific sectors, and a concluding summary. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Initially', 'In contrast', and 'In summary' are used appropriately to signal the progression of ideas. Paragraphing is handled well, ensuring each section serves a distinct function. However, referencing and transitions are sometimes slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as the recurring use of 'followed by'. While the overall arrangement is coherent, these minor mechanical lapses keep the cohesion score at Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for an academic task, incorporating terms like 'distinct sectors', 'considerably', 'substantial decline', and 'gradual increase'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with varying degrees of success; there are several lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'manufacturing sectors was popular among jobs' and 'An increasingly rise was recorded'. Spelling errors also appear, including 'manufacturacting' and 'agricultual'. Because the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points despite noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and spelling, a Band 6.0 is awarded.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and subordinate structures like 'while the other sectors represented a considerably steady rise, agriculture followed an opposite trend'. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are several structural and agreement errors throughout the essay, such as 'manufacturing sectors was' (singular/plural mismatch), 'remained growing', 'retail sectors was accounted for', and incorrect pluralization in '13 millions'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, but frequent errors in basic grammar structure reduce clarity at times, aligning the performance with Band 6.0 descriptors.

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