Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs four various sectors of economy in the US during the time period of 1960 to 2020.
Overall, jobs in retail and healtcare have risen over the period while those in manufacturing and agriculture have declined over time.
Regarding the jobs in retail and healtcare, the number is showing an upward trend throughout the timeline. In 1950, Retail had slightly over 5 million jobs, much more than healthcare which at the time had only about 2 million jobs. This figure is moderately increasing for both of these categories until 2000. In 2000, the figure for retail jobs in 15 million, and then it shows a very slow growth upto the year 2020, while the jobs in healtcare are still increasing from 2000 to 2020, and reaches its peak to just over 15 miilion and it is the same level as that of retail.
Regarding the jobs in manufacturing and agriculture, the number of jobs in both categories decreased overtime. Manufacturing started as the most popular one having 15 million jobs in 1960, it reached to its peak in 1980, where the number reached to 20 million. From 1980 to 2020, this figure started to decline steadily, with its lowest point in 2020 which is about 13 million. The number for agriculture started off with almost 6 million in 1960, then it gradually lowered till 1980. From 1980 to 2000, this figure plateaued, and remained around 3 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0
The student successfully covers all four sectors of the economy shown in the graph across the entire timeframe from 1960 to 2020. A clear overall trend is presented in the second paragraph, noting the rise in retail and healthcare and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. Key data points are reported correctly, such as manufacturing reaching a peak of 20 million in 1980 and healthcare matching retail at 16 million by 2020. There is a minor slip with the date 'In 1950' instead of 1960 when describing the starting point for retail, but overall the main features and comparisons are well selected and reported, meeting the criteria for a Band 7.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0
The response is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs grouping the categories logically (retail and healthcare together, manufacturing and agriculture together). Cohesive devices are used effectively to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Regarding the jobs in...' and 'From 1980 to 2000'. Paragraphing is used appropriately and logical progression is maintained throughout, though referencing could occasionally be smoother. This places the response firmly in the Band 7 range.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe trends, using terms like 'upward trend', 'plateaued', 'gradually lowered', and 'peak'. However, there are a few spelling errors, notably 'healtcare' (repeated), 'upto', and 'miilion'. Word choice is generally appropriate for an academic task, but these recurring minor mechanical errors in spelling prevent the lexical score from reaching higher bands. The vocabulary used is adequate to convey the data accurately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as relative clauses and temporal prepositional phrases. There are several grammatical inaccuracies and awkward phrasings, for example: 'number of jobs four various sectors of economy' (missing preposition), 'the number is showing' (tense consistency issues), and 'its lowest point in 2020 which is about 13 million'. However, these errors rarely impede overall communication and the reader can easily follow the intended meaning. This performance fits the Band 6 descriptor well.
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