Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line chart tracks the information about the quantity of jobs in tems of millions in the different sectors of the US such as manufaturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare over the period of 60 years.
Overall, it was observed from the given graph that retail and healthcare sectors represented tremendous soaring in form of jobs while agriculture sector created negligible employment.
By looking closely to the graph, it was interpreted that manufacturing sector in the beginning of the year 1960 generated 15 millions job and after showing slight increased, it was gradually declined and fell around 13 millions in 2020. Moreover, agriculture was around 5 millions in the initial year then pummet its jobs approximately 3 million in years 1980 and showed stability in generation of jobs till the end.
in addition, healthcare sector and retail sector were demonstrated improvement in every year. in 2000 retail was nearly 15 millions and healthcare was around 10 millions while in the ending year both had the similar number of jobs which was about 10 millions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response successfully covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends and making relevant comparisons across the four sectors. An overview is present, highlighting the contrasting trajectories of retail and healthcare versus agriculture. However, some parts are unevenly developed or contain inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, the final sentence claims that in the ending year both retail and healthcare had 'the similar number of jobs which was about 10 millions', whereas the graph clearly shows both reached approximately 16 million in 2020. This places the response in the band where all parts are addressed, but some details are under-developed or inaccurately reported.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used logically to group the sectors. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as 'Overall', 'By looking closely to the graph', and 'in addition'. However, referencing and progression are sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, as seen in phrases like 'in the ending year' and 'By looking closely to the graph'. The transition into the final paragraph also lacks smooth logical progression due to the factual inaccuracy regarding the 2020 data. This reflects the characteristics of a response that is coherent overall with some faulty cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'tremendous soaring', 'negligible employment', and 'stability'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors, including 'manufaturing', 'tems', 'increased' instead of 'increase', 'pummet' instead of 'plummet', and 'demonstrated improvement' where passive voice is misused. These lexical slips and inaccuracies show an attempt to use a varied range of vocabulary, but the control is inconsistent, which aligns with the band where vocabulary is adequate yet contains errors that occasionally reveal strain.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and adverbial phrases like 'over the period of 60 years'. However, there are several grammatical errors throughout the text, such as missing articles ('in beginning of the year', 'fell around 13 millions'), incorrect plurals ('15 millions job'), prepositions ('in terms of millions'), and tense inconsistencies ('was gradually declined'). Despite these errors in grammar, the meaning remains mostly clear and communication is rarely impeded, demonstrating the typical control of a mixed range of structures at this level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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