Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph below illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the manufacturing jobs in 1980 were highest as there was 20 millions jobs. On the other hand, the jobs for agriculture workers were lowest as there were around 6 millions jobs in 1960.

Looking at the details, in 1960, 15 millions manufacturing jobs were available which increased 5 millions in 1980. Although a great number of employements were available but it started to decrease and came from 20 to approximately 13 millions in 2020. Furthermore, jobs for agriculture in 1960 were 6 millions which decreased in 1980. For 20 years, the fighue remained constant from 1980 to 2000 then slightly drop in 2020.

Moreover, employements for both retail and healthcare significantly rose with a period of 60 years. In 1960, available jobs for health care were around 3 millions and experienced a great increase between 1980 and 2020. While jobs for retail also showed a great rose between 1980 and 2020. In 2020, jobs for both retail and heath care were availabe as there were 16 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the main features of the graph, presenting an overview and reporting data across the four sectors. However, the selection of information is limited and contains inaccuracies. For instance, the opening overview incorrectly focuses on a single point in time (manufacturing in 1980) rather than general trends, and states that agriculture was lowest with 6 million jobs in 1960, whereas agriculture and retail started at the same level. Furthermore, some data points are misreported, such as stating healthcare jobs started at around 3 million in 1960 when the chart shows 2 million. Ideas are underdeveloped, leaving some parts of the comparison unclear or partially addressed, which is characteristic of this band level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The text is arranged with a clear attempt at paragraphing, moving from an introduction to an overview, and then into detailed body paragraphs. However, overall progression is sometimes hindered by mechanical or repetitive cohesive devices, such as the repeated use of 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', and 'In 1960'. Referencing can also be imprecise, as seen with vague connectors like 'While jobs for retail also showed a great rose between 1980 and 2020', which lacks a complete comparative clause. While the underlying message is generally followable, the links between sentences and paragraphs lack flexibility and natural flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to discuss economic sectors and trends. However, there are noticeable lexical errors in word form and collocation, such as '20 millions jobs' instead of '20 million jobs', 'employements' instead of 'employment', 'fighue' instead of 'figure', and 'a great rose' instead of 'a significant rise'. Spelling and word-choice inaccuracies occasionally appear, such as 'heath care' and 'availabe', although they do not completely impede communication. To reach a higher band, the student needs to use less common lexical items with greater precision and accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing displays a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple and moderately complex forms. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with pluralisation, articles, and prepositions within structures, such as 'as there was 20 millions jobs' (subject-verb agreement and pluralisation), 'increased 5 millions' (missing preposition), and 'with a period of 60 years' instead of 'over a period of 60 years'. While the attempts at complex sentences are present, they are often faulty. These frequent errors require the reader to occasionally expend effort to interpret the intended meaning.

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