Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line chart illustrates about the four sectors of the economy securing number of jobs in US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the retail and Healthcare were the two sectors which started from the lower numbers and reached at same level throughout the years. whereas, the other two sectors manufacturing and agriculture declined from their starting point.

The foremost data of retail sector was having 6 million jobs and healthcare was less than 5 million jobs in 1960 from which both the sectors increased its numbers throughout the years. In 1980, healthcare reached at 5 million whereas retail secured 10 million jobs. After 20 years, Retail and healthcare inclined to 15 and more than 10 millions, respectively. At last in 2020, Both of these sectors reached at same level of more than 15 million jobs.

On the other hand, manufacturing and Agriculture sectors started from 15 and 6 million jobs in 1960 respectively. After 20 years manufacturing sector showed increase to 20 million but agriculture sector decreased to almost 3 million numbers of jobs. In 2000, manufacturing sector reduced about 3 millions but in the same year agriculture sector remain steady as previous. In 2020, agriculture sector showed minimal decline whereas manufacturing sector fall below 15 million number of jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting on all four economic sectors and presenting a general overview of the trends. The overview correctly highlights the diverging trajectories of the categories, noting that retail and healthcare grew while manufacturing and agriculture declined overall. However, some aspects of the response are more fully developed than others. For instance, the discussion of the final year for the retail and healthcare sectors lacks precise elaboration on the minor nuances, and some figures are stated with slight approximation gaps, such as describing healthcare in 1960 as less than 5 million when the data shows 2 million. This places the response comfortably at this level, as the main features and key comparisons between the growing and declining sectors are successfully identified and communicated to the reader.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph structure separating the overview and the body details. Information is logically grouped, with the rising sectors discussed together in one paragraph and the declining sectors contrasted in the next using transition signals like 'On the other hand'. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. For example, referencing is occasionally repetitive or vague, such as the frequent use of 'these sectors' and 'both of these sectors' without sufficient variation. Paragraphing is used appropriately to divide the introduction, overview, and specific data groups, contributing to an overall logical flow despite the occasional repetitive cohesive devices.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less-common terms related to data trends such as 'inclined', 'declined', and 'steady'. However, there are notable inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form. For instance, writing 'illustrates about' is incorrect, and terms like 'inclined' are used where 'increased' or 'climbed' would be more natural. Furthermore, phrases like 'minimal decline' and 'reduced about 3 millions' exhibit minor lexical errors and awkward phrasing that do not impede overall communication but prevent the writing from achieving a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures like relative clauses and contrasting conjunctions. There are, however, some errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues, such as 'retail and Healthcare were the two sectors which started', missing articles before singular countable nouns like 'US', and prepositional errors in phrases like 'reached at same level'. Despite these grammatical lapses, the structures used do not obscure the meaning, and communication is maintained without significant difficulty for the reader.

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