Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph compares the number of jobs in four sectors(manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that the manufacturing sector accounted for the highest proportion of jobs in the US, while agriculture had the lowest figure. By contrast, the retail and healthcare sectors followed a similar pattern.

In 1960, manufacturing sector was the dominant factor among other three jobs and peaked at 20 million in 1980. Although, the proportion of jobs declined in both the years in 2000 and 2020. By contrast, retail and healthcare sector, overall increased dramatically from 1960 to 2020. Retail and agriculture sector were identicial in 2020. Meanwhile, in 1960, agriculture sector was the least jobs done by the US citizen. Intially, the proportion of a

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response covers some of the key features of the graph, such as the overall dominance of manufacturing and the general trends for retail and healthcare. However, the report is incomplete because it falls below the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, ending abruptly mid-sentence at 'Intially, the proportion of a'. Furthermore, the selection of data is somewhat imprecise; for instance, the claim that 'Retail and agriculture sector were identicial in 2020' is factually incorrect according to the graph, as retail was around 16 million and agriculture stood at 2 million. To reach a higher level, the response must meet the word length requirement, present a fully developed overview, and accurately report data values and comparisons without mechanical errors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The essay attempts a basic structure with an introduction and body paragraphs, and uses some simple cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', and 'By contrast'. However, the overall progression is disrupted by the sudden, incomplete ending of the text. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is sometimes mechanical or confusing, such as the sudden shift to comparing retail and agriculture in the final sentences without clear logical continuity. Additionally, referencing is occasionally vague, as seen in phrases like 'among other three jobs'. To improve, the writer needs to ensure ideas flow logically from start to finish, avoid repetitive or disjointed statements, and complete all sentences and paragraphs fully.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for basic tasks, allowing the student to discuss economic sectors and general trends using terms like 'sector', 'dominant factor', and 'declined'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'least jobs done by the US citizen' instead of 'the lowest number of jobs', and spelling errors like 'identicial' and 'Intially'. The range of vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, preventing the response from achieving a higher score. To improve, the student should expand their range of functional vocabulary for describing data trends, pay closer attention to standard word forms, and carefully check their spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response employs a very limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple sentences with occasional attempts at complex forms that are often faulty or incomplete. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with missing or incorrect articles and prepositions, such as 'manufacturing sector was the dominant factor among other three jobs' instead of 'among the other three', and 'in both the years in 2000 and 2020'. Punctuation and verb tense usage are also inconsistent, and the response ends with an unfinished sentence fragment. To achieve a higher band, the writer must demonstrate better control over basic grammatical structures, use articles and plurals accurately, and construct complete, error-free sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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