Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four diffrent sector of the economy in the US over the period between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is evident that in manufacturing sector there are highest number of job opportunities between the year 1960 to 2000, whereas, Agriculture sectors lowest number of jobs between the year 1980 to 2000. However, the percentage of jobs in Healthcare and Retail industry have almost similar at the year 2020.

Looking first at, Manufacturing area the numbers of jobs are rose from 15 million to 20 millions and after that the numbers of jobs are dramatically decrease every year and reach at about 13 million in final year. Whereas, Retail industry have about millions number of jobs at the year 1960 and gradually increase the percentage of jobs in every year by some portion and reach at 16 millions in the last year.

On the other hand, in the first year of the numbers of jobs in agriculture sector is nearly 6 million while slightly decline by some portion and reach at close to 4 million and then the number of jobs is similar until upto the year 2020. Afterthat, the portion of jobs from the Healthcare sector is sharply increased in every year from 3 million in 1960 to about 16 million in final year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors shown in the graph and attempts to provide an overview, but the main features are only partially presented. For instance, the overview contains factual inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, stating that manufacturing had the highest number of jobs between 1960 and 2000, and agriculture the lowest, but it mixes up trends and proportions. In the body paragraphs, some data points are inaccurate or poorly supported, such as stating retail had 'about millions number of jobs at the year 1960' and misreading the initial healthcare figure. The ideas are limited and under-developed, meaning the response addresses the prompt only partially, showing characteristics typical of this band level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has some general organization into paragraphs, attempting to group information logically by sector, but there is no clear overall progression. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, with mechanical transitions like 'Looking first at,' 'On the other hand,' and 'Afterthat' dominating the structure. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, making the flow bumpy. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion fails to smoothly connect the data points. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to use more sophisticated and accurate cohesive devices and ensure a smoother, logical progression of ideas throughout the report.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task. There are noticeable spelling mistakes ('diffrent', 'Afterthat') and word choice errors, such as using 'percentage of jobs' instead of number of jobs, and awkward phrases like 'millions number of jobs'. Attempts to use less common vocabulary are marred by inaccuracies in collocation and word form. While the meaning is generally retrievable despite these flaws, the frequent slips in lexical choice restrict the response from achieving a higher score. Expanding the repertoire of precise statistical vocabulary and checking spelling would significantly improve this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer employs a limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are persistent errors in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions, such as 'are rose', 'the numbers of jobs are dramatically decrease', 'have about millions number of jobs', and 'until upto'. Punctuation and article usage also show frequent errors that cause some difficulty for the reader and obscure meaning. To achieve a higher band, the student must demonstrate better control over basic sentence construction, ensure correct tense usage for past data, and reduce the frequency of grammatical errors.

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