Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph below illustrates the information about the proportion of occupations in millions in four segments that are manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare of the economy in US over the period of 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is evident that the retail and healthcare sections rose dramatically, while the healthcare factor kept declining slightly after dropping to the certain figures. The most noticeable alteration was made by manufacturing section which dropped significantly after rising once.

By looking upon the upward trend making categories, it is apparent that the retail and agriculture segments expand significantly from 6 million and 3 million in 1960 respectively and reached the same ultimate level of about 16 million in 2020.

Turing to the other categories, it is apparent that the manufacturing section initially rose to 20 million in 1980 and later, fall dramatically to 13 million in 2020. The health care sector initially faced a declining trend of about 4 million in 1980 from 6 million in 1960 before ultimately reducing to 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to address the task by summarizing some trends from the graph, but it contains significant inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the visual data. For example, the student claims that 'the healthcare factor kept declining slightly' and that 'agriculture segments expand significantly,' both of which directly contradict the data in the graph where agriculture clearly declines and healthcare rises substantially. Furthermore, the description confuses sectors and data points, such as stating that the health care sector initially faced a declining trend from 6 million in 1960, whereas the graph shows healthcare starting at 2 million. While an overview is attempted, the severe factual errors in reporting the main trends prevent the response from being fully accurate, resulting in a minimal and flawed treatment of the visual data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response exhibits some organizational structure with a discernible introduction, overview, and body paragraphs, fulfilling basic paragraphing conventions. However, overall progression is hindered by confusing transitions and logical contradictions between sentences. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall,' 'By looking upon,' and 'Turning to the other categories' are attempted to link ideas, but they are sometimes used mechanically or inaccurately. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, creating confusion about which sector is being discussed. While the text is divided into paragraphs, the lack of a clear, logical flow and faulty cohesive ties keep the structural delivery at a developing level.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student displays an adequate vocabulary range to communicate basic information about the economic sectors, attempting less common items such as 'proportion', 'segments', 'alteration', and 'ultimately reducing'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and miscollocations. For instance, 'healthcare factor' and 'upward trend making categories' are unnatural word choices, and the misuse of 'agriculture segments expand significantly' reflects a confusion of word meanings regarding trends. Spelling is generally acceptable, but frequent issues with word choice and collocation mean the vocabulary control remains limited and occasionally impedes smooth communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, such as 'While the healthcare factor kept declining slightly after dropping to the certain figures.' However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent due to frequent errors in prepositions, verb tenses, and articles, including phrases like 'in US over the period', 'alteration was made by manufacturing section', and 'fall dramatically' instead of 'fell'. Punctuation is generally functional, but control over complex grammatical patterns is weak. These frequent errors in basic structures and agreement cause occasional difficulty for the reader.

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