Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph shows the number of jobs in US ecomony between 1960 till 2020 in four sectors, that is Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Health care,

It shows that in manufacturing sector the graph decreases after 1980, in 1960 it was at 15M which was increased by 5M in 1980 but as the years passes it decreases to approxmiately 13M. Whereas retail shows a big increase by time it went from 6% in 1960's to 16M in 2020. In contrast to that healthcare also shows increase in jobs as it started from roughly 2M in 1960, icreased by 5M in 1980 then a big chance of 11M in 2000 and in 2020 it's 16M. Agriculture sector demostrate gradually decreasing graph from 1960 to 2020 as it decreases from 6M to almost 3M.

The graph shows that Retail and Healthcare have progressed from 1960 till 2020 to the same point at 16M jobs, whereas manufacturing and agricultural sector shows decrease in jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main trends and making relevant comparisons across the four sectors. An overview is present at the beginning and reinforced at the end, noting the convergence of Retail and Healthcare and the contrasting declines in Manufacturing and Agriculture. Key data points are generally reported accurately, such as Manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 before declining, and Retail and Healthcare both reaching 16 million in 2020. However, some ideas and features are slightly under-developed or vague, such as the minor spelling typo in 'approxmiately' and the misstatement of retail units as percentages ('6% in 1960's'). To reach the next level, the student should ensure all data points are cited with absolute precision and avoid occasional over-generalised leaps in data reporting.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The report demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs grouping the trends, and a concluding summary. Information is logically sequenced, moving from sector trends to overall comparisons. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical due to run-on sentences and a lack of proper punctuation between clauses, such as 'Healthcare... increased by 5M in 1980 then a big chance of 11M in 2000 and in 2020 it's 16M'. Paragraphing could also be more strictly controlled; the body of the response is contained within a single large block. To achieve a higher band, the student must use cohesive devices more flexibly and divide the body into distinct, logically separated paragraphs for contrasting trends.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying basic economic sectors and trend directions such as 'decreases', 'increase', and 'gradually decreasing graph'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'demostrate' and 'progressed', but these are accompanied by noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, spelling, and word form. For example, 'chance' is used instead of 'change', 'ecomony' is misspelled, and 'agricultural sector shows' suffers from a subject-verb agreement slip or pluralisation error. Furthermore, units are confused when retail is described as '6%'. To improve, the student needs to expand their range of functional vocabulary for data reporting and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting multi-clause structures to contrast trends, as seen in 'Whereas retail shows a big increase by time it went from...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including comma splices, missing punctuation between independent clauses, and tense shifts such as 'it's 16M' instead of 'it was'. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher rating. To move up, the student must demonstrate better control over complex sentence architecture, ensuring correct subordination, punctuation, and consistent past-tense usage when describing historical data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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