Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The chart illustrates details about the number of jobs in four different sectors -Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare- of the economy in the US over the time period between 1960 and 2020. The jobs have been given in millions.

Overall, what stands out from the graph is that manufacturing was the largest sector of economy in 20th century, while agriculture was the lowest sector of country's wealth. Although, manufacturing faced dipped in 21st century, but agriculture remained stable.

Looking at the graph, around 15 millions job produced by manufacturing in 1960, which increased up to 20 millions in next 20 years, but at the end of the trend it sharply decreased to approximately 13 millions. Retail industry generated high amount of jobs, started with only 6 millions in 1960 and in 2000, it recorded 15 millions jobs and finally levelled off over the period ends.

By contrast, Healthcare started it's trend with around 3 millions job, and produced lower amount of 2 millions job in next 20 years, and then followed the upward trend for next 40 years. Whereas, agriculture also produced same number of jobs as retail, but it did not give boost to market, and lost approximately half number of oppurtunities in 1980, and followed same trend till 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors mentioned in the graph and attempts to present an overview, as well as select and report main features. However, some parts of the data are inaccurate or under-developed. For example, the student states that healthcare 'produced lower amount of 2 millions job in next 20 years', whereas the graph shows healthcare rising from 2 million in 1960 to 5 million in 1980. The statement that 'agriculture also produced same number of jobs as retail' in 1960 is correct, but the subsequent commentary on agricultural trends lacks clarity and contains factual confusion regarding market impact. The overview touches upon manufacturing and agriculture, but fails to capture the significant upward trajectories of retail and healthcare. To move to a higher band, the response needs to ensure greater accuracy when reporting specific data points and develop the overview more comprehensively.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement and attempts paragraphing with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, logical progression is occasionally hindered by imprecise cohesive devices and awkward transitions. For instance, the sentence 'Although, manufacturing faced dipped in 21st century, but agriculture remained stable' uses contradictory conjunctions ('Although' and 'but') and introduces a minor mechanical error. Referencing and linking between sentences in the body paragraphs can be repetitive, such as the frequent reliance on 'started with' or 'followed the upward trend'. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion within paragraphs requires tighter logical control. To achieve a higher score, the student should use cohesive devices more accurately and ensure smoother transitions between ideas without redundant connectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully incorporating topic-specific terms like 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare'. The student attempts less common vocabulary such as 'approximately', 'sharply decreased', and 'levelled off'. However, there are noticeable word-choice and word-form errors that detract from precision, such as 'manufacturing faced dipped' instead of 'faced a dip', '15 millions job' instead of 'million jobs', and the misspelling 'oppurtunities'. Additionally, phrasing like 'lowest sector of country's wealth' is unnatural in the context of employment statistics. To reach the next level, the writer needs to expand their range of less common lexical items while eliminating collocation and word-form errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to use relative clauses and compound-complex structures. However, frequent grammatical errors occur across various structures. There are persistent issues with article usage, pluralisation, and subject-verb agreement, such as 'around 15 millions job produced by manufacturing' (missing auxiliary verb and incorrect pluralisation) and 'Healthcare started it's trend' (incorrect use of the apostrophe in 'its'). Prepositions and verb tenses are also mishandled in places, such as 'over the period ends'. While these errors rarely completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the writing from securing a higher band. Improving grammatical accuracy and reducing basic structural slips would elevate this criterion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.