Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This graph shows the information about number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.As u can see x-axis is mentioned as Year and y-axis is mentioned as jobs.In addition, you can see the lines in graphs where each is defined , to easily understand the meaning behind the lines. The circle shape lines shows us the manufacturing. Triangle shape lines shows the retail, rectangle shape lines shows the agriculture and lastly, diamond shaped lines shows the healthcare.As u can see healthcare lines it increases from the year 1960 to 2020 , as we also we see the increasing of the retail from the year 1960 to 2020 healthcare and retail have met at the same point but the only difference is agriculture has 0jobs and retail starts from 5million jobs.As for agriculture the jobs haven’t reached up from the year 1980 and for manufacturing it’s peak was 1980 but later it hasn’t increased as u can see instead of increasing it has decreased . therefore, this graph shows us the peak era of different kinds of jobs when it went up high in the scale and when it came down in the scale from this, we learn that how the job market works as the generation grows means where it has more demand.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response makes a partial attempt to address the task by outlining some general trends and mentioning the four sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare). However, the coverage is incomplete and features are handled inadequately. The student relies heavily on meta-language and direct commentary addressing the reader, such as writing "As u can see x-axis is mentioned as Year and y-axis is mentioned as jobs" and "In addition, you can see the lines in graphs", rather than objectively reporting the data. Furthermore, key comparative features are either omitted or misreported, such as the statement regarding agriculture having zero jobs. The overall response fails to present a clear, fully developed overview of the main trends shown in the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The organisation of the text severely lacks structure, resulting in a single massive block of text without proper paragraphing. Cohesive devices are used inappropriately or mechanically, with repetitive phrases like "As u can see" appearing multiple times. There is no clear logical progression or sequencing of information; instead, the writer jumps erratically between chart descriptions, axis explanations, and personal commentary. Referencing is also weak, making it difficult for the reader to follow which data points correspond to which sectors due to confusing explanations of the line shapes.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, restricted to basic terms like "increase", "decrease", "jobs", and "sectors". There are numerous instances of informal language, abbreviations, and chat-style writing, such as the use of "u" instead of "you". Word choices are occasionally imprecise or inaccurate, for instance describing the visual markers as "circle shape lines" and "rectangle shape lines". Spelling errors and basic word-choice limitations are noticeable, restricting communication and preventing the vocabulary range from being adequate for a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The grammatical range is very limited, consisting mostly of simple and heavily flawed complex structures. There are frequent errors in sentence construction, punctuation, and article usage, such as missing articles before nouns ("is mentioned as jobs", "it's peak was 1980"). Run-on sentences are common, joined improperly by commas or conjunctions without appropriate subordination. Errors frequently cause difficulty for the reader in parsing the intended meaning, particularly in overly long sentences that attempt to express multiple ideas simultaneously without proper control.
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