Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graphic report that are giving the details related to the jobs from one to four sectors. The details are briefly provided of the years which are basically 1960 to 1980 and 1980 to 2000 and further from 2000 to 2020 on economy of America. In these years the details are on these four topics which are starting from manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. The jobs in person numbers are goes to in millions from starting to zero . In 1960 the healthcare goes from 2 to 5 increase in 1980 and goes upto 11 in 2000. In 2020 the healthcare incessantly infrared to 16 . On behalf of others the retail is up from 6 to 16 in between 1960 to 2020. Most the highest changes in agriculture start from 15 to go to 20. And suddenly low from 20 to 14 in 2000. After these days it goes more down to 12 from 16 to in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.0
Lexical Resource4.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.5
Overall4.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response addresses the task only minimally and tangentially. While the writer attempts to discuss the line graph concerning job sectors in the US from 1960 to 2020, the attempt fails to provide a clear overview or accurately report the main features. For instance, the data points are severely confused and misread, such as stating that agriculture started at 15 and went to 20 when the graph clearly shows manufacturing starting at that level and agriculture beginning at 6. Furthermore, the descriptions of trends are vague and incoherent, making it difficult to follow the factual information presented. To reach a higher level, the response must accurately select and report key trends from the visual data without significant factual errors, and present a coherent overall summary of the information provided.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently in this response. There is a lack of clear overall progression, and the text is not organized into logical paragraphs. Sentences are strung together with weak or missing logical links, such as abrupt transitions like 'On behalf of others' and 'After these days'. Referencing and cohesive devices are inadequate, making the progression of ideas confusing for the reader. To improve, the writer needs to group related information logically, use clear paragraphing (such as an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs for specific data), and employ a wider range of cohesive devices to connect ideas smoothly and guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic, repetitive, and restricted. The writer relies heavily on simple words and terms lifted or poorly paraphrased from the prompt, such as 'jobs', 'sectors', and 'economy'. There are notable word choice and word form errors that strain communication, such as 'graphic report that are giving' and the misused phrase 'incessantly infrared to 16'. Less common lexical items are either absent or incorrectly applied. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their vocabulary range to include precise terms for describing statistical trends, such as verbs and adverbs indicating change, and ensure correct word forms and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response displays a very limited range of sentence structures, consisting mostly of basic attempts that frequently contain severe grammatical errors. Errors occur across multiple categories, including verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions, as seen in phrases like 'The graphic report that are giving', 'The jobs in person numbers are goes to', and 'start from 15 to go to 20'. These frequent errors distort meaning and cause considerable difficulty for the reader. To improve, the writer needs to demonstrate control over basic sentence patterns, use accurate verb tenses for past and present time frames, and reduce basic grammatical slips to ensure clearer communication.

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