Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the four sectors of the US economy and the amount of employment in each sector between 1960 and 2020. Overall, there has been a substantial growth in the retail and healthcare sector. In contrast, with the manufacturing and agriculture which has declined over the years.

Manufacturing sector provided the most employment with over 15 million jobs in 1960. It increased till the year 1980 with figures going upto 20 million, but declined siginficantly over the years dropping to a little over 12.5 million jobs. Agriculture also kept falling during the timeline from a little over 5 million jobs in 1960 to almost half of it in 2020.

On the contrary retail and healthcare sectors kept on rising with approximately 5.5 million and 2.5 million jobs in 1960 to over 15 million jobs each, respectively. The figures matched in the year 2020 and the figures kept on increasing in every two decades.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear overview and highlighting the main trends and comparisons across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. The student correctly identifies that retail and healthcare experienced substantial growth, whereas manufacturing and agriculture saw downward trends. Key data points are accurately reported, such as manufacturing peaking in 1980 and healthcare and retail reaching approximately 15 million jobs. However, the explanation is slightly uneven in places, such as the incomplete sentence structure in the introduction ('In contrast, with the manufacturing and agriculture which has declined'), which pulls the development down slightly. To reach a higher band, the overview could be sharper and integrate the data comparisons more seamlessly without minor structural fragmentation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response maintains a clear logical organisation and progression throughout the four-paragraph structure. Information is grouped sensibly, with the introduction outlining the core purpose and trends, followed by body paragraphs dedicated to contrasting sector trajectories. Cohesive devices are used adequately, featuring transition phrases such as 'Overall', 'In contrast', 'It increased', and 'On the contrary'. Paragraphing is handled appropriately, ensuring that each part of the visual data is discussed in a structured sequence. However, referencing and transitions occasionally feel slightly mechanical, such as 'The figures matched in the year 2020 and the figures kept on increasing', which lacks smoother integration. A more flexible and varied use of cohesive mechanisms would elevate this criterion further.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, successfully conveying trends using terms like 'substantial growth', 'declined significantly', and 'employment'. There are some successful attempts at less common vocabulary items, showing an awareness of lexical style. However, there are notable word choice and spelling inaccuracies, such as the typo 'siginficantly' and the awkward phrasing 'the amount of employment' rather than 'the level of employment'. Furthermore, some expressions are repetitive, relying on standard verbs like 'kept on rising' and 'kept falling'. These minor lexical slips and spelling errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the response from achieving a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and temporal markers. There is adequate control over basic verb tenses, successfully describing past trends spanning several decades. However, there are some noticeable grammatical errors and awkward structures, particularly in the introduction where the contrast clause is incomplete ('In contrast, with the manufacturing and agriculture which has declined over the years'). Other minor issues include prepositional slips like 'going upto' (spelt as one word) and minor punctuation oversights. While these errors rarely impede communication, the presence of these structural slips means the sentence-level accuracy remains at this level.

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