Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The chart demonstrates the number of jobs in the four sectors of the economy in America from 1960 to 2020.

By and large, compared to the others, the Manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs, which was later replaced by both the retail and healthcare sectors. The lowest jobs sector had later get the highest jobs sector, along with one other sector.

To begin with, the manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs, which were 15 million in 1960. Then it rose sharply to the peak of the chart among others sectors, which was 20 million in 1960 before falling continuously to around 17 million and 13 million in 2000 and 2020, respectively. Furthermore, the agriculture sector had 6 million jobs in 1960. It dropped by half to almost 3 million jobs in 1980, which levelled off till 2000 before falling steadily to 2 million jobs in 2020.

Moreover, the retail and healthcare sectors had 6 and 2.5 million jobs in 1960, which then increased gradually to the same number, which was 16 million jobs in 2020. It was the highest number of jobs in 2020 together.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by summarising data from the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020 and making appropriate comparisons, such as noting how retail and healthcare eventually matched manufacturing. However, some aspects are under-developed or imprecise. For instance, the overview sentence stating 'The lowest jobs sector had later get the highest jobs sector' is confusing and lacks clarity. Furthermore, the body paragraph contains a factual misreading of the graph by stating that manufacturing reached 20 million in 1960, whereas the chart shows 15 million in 1960 and 20 million in 1980. To reach the next level, the overview needs to be clearer and more precise, avoiding clumsy phrasing, and all data points must be reported accurately without temporal confusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement and is divided into appropriate paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, an overview, and separate body paragraphs for the categories. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'Moreover' are used to structure the text, though referencing is occasionally faulty or mechanical, particularly in the overview and concluding sentences where pronouns like 'it' create ambiguity. Paragraphing is present, but progression within the overview could be smoother to help the reader follow the overarching trends more easily. To improve further, cohesive ties should connect ideas more naturally and referencing must clearly link back to the correct economic sectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to trends and data reporting, such as 'rose sharply', 'falling continuously', and 'levelled off'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, but there are instances of lexical inaccuracy and awkward phrasing, such as 'The lowest jobs sector had later get the highest jobs sector' and 'highest number of jobs in 2020 together'. Spelling is generally accurate, but word choice errors occasionally restrict precision. To achieve a higher band, the writer should employ a wider range of precise lexical items and collocation patterns while eliminating awkward or repetitive expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and time markers effectively, such as 'which was 15 million in 1960'. There are some noticeable errors in grammar and verb tense usage, particularly in the overview where the construction 'had later get' is ungrammatical. Other sentences contain minor slip-ups, but these errors rarely impede overall communication. The majority of simple sentences are accurate, and punctuation is generally handled well. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free complex structures and ensure tighter control over verb forms and tense consistency when discussing past statistical trends.

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