Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph provides information about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the manufacturing sector in 1960 recorded the highest figure while healthcare sector had the least number of jobs. However, the retail and healthcare sector had similar figure in 2020.
Looking at the details, it is clear that in 1960 manufacturing sector had the higest number of jobs which was 15million and in 1980 it further rose moderately and reached at 20million. However, with the passage of time it experienced a a considerable decline and recorded figure was 10.5 million. The retail sector had around 5.2 million jobs in 1960 and showed a sharp increase until 2000 . From 2000 it remained stable until 2020 and reached at 15 million.
Comparatively, the agriculture sector in 1960 had around 5.1 million jobs and showed a minor decline in 1980 and then reamined stable and at the end it reached at 2 million. On the other hand, initially, healthcare sector had 2 million jobs . It experienced a dramatic increase across the years and at the end it stood at 15 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response covers all parts of the prompt by selecting and reporting the main features of the graph, presenting a clear overview of the beginning and end points. Key data points are cited, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 and healthcare rising to 16 million. However, some parts are unevenly developed or contain slight inaccuracies when compared to the visual data, such as stating that manufacturing dropped to 10.5 million in 2020 when the graph shows approximately 13 million, and minor figures are misreported in places. While the main trends are identified, the lack of complete accuracy across all data points prevents a higher rating.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and two body paragraphs detailing the specific trends. Information is generally ordered logically, moving from manufacturing and retail to agriculture and healthcare. Cohesive devices such as 'However', 'Looking at the details', and 'Comparatively' are employed to guide the reader through the data. Referencing is mostly clear, though paragraphing and the flow of information display some mechanical transitions, and the connection between sentences occasionally feels slightly abrupt. This reflects a solid performance meeting the requirements of the half-band step.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and descriptive phrases such as 'considerable decline', 'sharp increase', and 'dramatic increase'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice and phrasing, such as 'reached at' instead of simply 'reached', and occasional spelling or spacing issues like 'reamined'. While communication is not impeded and the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main trends, these recurring lexical slips and restricted flexibility keep the score at this level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and introductory phrases. There are, however, some recurring errors in grammar and punctuation, such as missing articles ('the manufacturing sector', 'the healthcare sector'), prepositions ('reached at'), and repetition of verbs. While these errors occur throughout the text, they are relatively minor and rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended data reporting without significant difficulty.
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