Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 7.5)
The line graph compares the number of employees in the United States in four different sectors of economy between 1960 to 2020.
Overall, employment in manufacturig and agriculture declined over the period, whereas retail and healthcare grew substatially. As a result sector that dominated in 1960 was overtaken by the end.
In 1960, manufacturing was largest employer, with around 15 million jobs, and it continued to rise to a peak of 20 million by 1980. After that, however, it fell steadly, dropping to about 13 million by 2020. Agriculture, meanwhile, was already at 6 million in 1960 and shrank furthur to ust 2 million, remaining the smallest sector.
The rising sectors told the different story. Retail grew steadly from 6 million to around 16 million, while healthcare showed the most dramatic growth of all, soaring from just 2 million to roughly 16 million by 2020. By te end of time period, retail and healthcare become the joint-largest employers, each overtaking a much-reduced manufacturing sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 8.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.5 |
| Overall | 7.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 8.5
The response covers all parts of the task well, presenting a clear and accurate overview of the main trends shown in the graph. The student successfully highlights key features, such as the peak and subsequent decline in manufacturing jobs alongside the dramatic, opposing rise in retail and healthcare sectors. Data is used effectively to support descriptions, with specific figures accurately cited from the visual data. The progression and major contrasts between the four economic sectors are fully developed, with only minor omissions. To move toward the highest band, the overview could integrate even sharper synthesis of the overall redistribution of the workforce across the sixty-year span.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8.0
Information and ideas are logically sequenced, providing a clear progression throughout the report. The response is divided into sensible paragraphs that group contrasting trends effectively. Cohesive devices are managed well, using transition words and referencing phrases such as 'whereas', 'after that, however', 'meanwhile', and 'while healthcare showed the most dramatic growth' to connect ideas smoothly. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately to guide the reader from the introduction through the main body paragraphs and overview. Referencing is generally clear, though minor improvements in cohesive flow would elevate it further.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and precise reporting language such as 'dominates', 'overtaken', 'peak', 'shrank', and 'dramatic growth'. However, there are a few noticeable spelling errors ('manufacturig', 'substatially', 'steadly', 'furthur', 'ust', 'te') and minor word choice slips that prevent a higher score. While communication is not impeded and the vocabulary is sufficient to describe trends effectively, greater accuracy in spelling and tighter lexical control are needed to reach the next tier.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.5
The response makes use of a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with good overall control, featuring frequent error-free sentences. Complex structures are handled reasonably well, as seen in clauses like 'whereas retail and healthcare grew substatially' and 'while healthcare showed the most dramatic growth of all'. Grammatical accuracy is generally high, though there are isolated minor errors such as missing articles ('As a result sector', 'By te end of time period') and a slight phrasing slip ('become' instead of 'became'). Overall punctuation and verb tenses are well managed for historical data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.