Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line charts shows the availability of jobs in four different sectors of economy in US between [redacted phone]. It is evident that job creation in two diciplines is more as compared to rest of the two.

Initially, there were ample jobs in manufacturing industry and it rose to 20 million in 1980 which is the highest amongst all, after that it dropped to around 18 million in 2020. Incredibly, employment opportunities had significant rise in both healthcare and retail sectors, starting from 1960 both increased side by side and reached to 17 millions in 2020. Meanwhile, instead of providing more ways for employment in agriculture. It has observed a drastic drop in it. From 7 millions during 1960 to about 3 million in 2020 is shocking as well as alarming.

Overall, a positive surge is noted in both healthcare and retail economy and they followed the same trend. While in agriculture and manufacturing sector, number of jobs get depleted with the passage of time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors over the sixty-year period. An overview is present at the beginning and reinforced at the end, highlighting the general positive surge in healthcare and retail alongside the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, some aspects of the data are reported with minor inaccuracies; for instance, the student states that manufacturing dropped to 'around 18 million in 2020' when the chart indicates roughly 13 million, and agriculture started around 6 million rather than 7. These inaccuracies, along with some slight under-development in comparing specific cross-sector figures, place the response at a solid level where the overall information is clear and adequately presented, though it falls short of fully extending all comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The text demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from an introductory statement, through body paragraphs detailing specific sector trends, to a concluding overview. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, the body data, and the final summary. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as 'Initially', 'after that', 'Meanwhile', and 'Overall'. However, referencing and cohesion are occasionally mechanical or slightly faulty, as seen in the phrasing 'instead of providing more ways for employment in agriculture. It has observed a drastic drop in it', which creates a fragmented transition between sentences and disrupts the smooth flow of information.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common terms such as 'availability', 'disciplines', 'employment opportunities', and 'depleted'. However, there are notable lexical errors, word choice inaccuracies, and spelling mistakes that prevent the response from achieving a higher band. For example, 'diciplines' is misspelled, 'retail economy' is an unnatural collocation, and 'number of jobs get depleted' uses an inappropriate tense/form for formal academic writing. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they demonstrate a limited control over less common lexical items and precise word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied structures such as relative clauses and introductory prepositional phrases. Grammatical control is mixed, featuring some error-free sentences alongside persistent errors in punctuation, subject-verb agreement, and sentence boundaries. For instance, the opening sentence contains a subject-verb disagreement ('The line charts shows'), and the sentence starting with 'Meanwhile, instead of providing...' is a fragmented structure that lacks a main clause. Despite these errors in grammar and punctuation, they rarely impede communication entirely, allowing the core meaning to be understood by the reader.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.