Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph shows number of jobs in manufacturing retail agriculture healthcare in US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, manufacturing was the most notable feature while retail was also significant. The remaining categories showed relatively minor changes.

To begin with, manufacturing started at 15 millions. It then rose and reached 20 million in year 1980 and the fell to 13 million by the end year. This was the most significant feature of the graph.

Turning to the other lines, Second thing retail began at 6 million and rose to 14 million in year 2020 by the end. Similarly, healthcare started at 2 million in year 1960 and finished at 16 million in 2020. Finally last thing agriculture showed the least change going from 6 million to 2 million overall.

In conclusion, Most important thing manufacturing showed the most significant change while least important thing agriculture remained relatively stable throughout the whole period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting on the four sectors over the given period, but the treatment is uneven. An overview is attempted at the end of the introduction, noting that manufacturing was prominent while retail was significant and agriculture showed minor changes, though it overlooks healthcare. The main features are selected, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 before declining, and retail rising steadily. However, some parts are under-developed or imprecise, such as omitting healthcare in the initial summary and providing a slightly inaccurate ending figure for retail. The response covers the main trends adequately to satisfy the requirements for this level, though a more fully integrated overview and tighter data reporting would be needed for a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response maintains a coherent overall arrangement and follows a logical structure, beginning with an introduction and grouping the data points across subsequent body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used to separate the categories, moving from manufacturing to retail, healthcare, and agriculture. However, cohesion is frequently faulty or mechanical, relying on overly conversational and repetitive transitional phrases like 'To begin with', 'Turning to the other lines, Second thing', and 'Finally last thing'. Referencing and logical progression are occasionally hindered by these awkward discourse markers, preventing the response from achieving a smoother and more sophisticated flow of ideas throughout the text.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the basic data trends with terms such as 'rose', 'fell', and 'stable'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary and numerical descriptions, but this is accompanied by noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and phrasing, such as 'end year' instead of 'end of the period' or 'final year'. There are also minor omissions and awkward collocations like 'least change' instead of 'the least amount of change'. Spelling is generally correct, and while the lexical range is somewhat limited, it remains minimally sufficient to convey the intended information without severely impeding communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing displays a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, demonstrating basic control over sentence construction. There are, however, several grammatical errors throughout the response, including missing articles ('in US', 'in year 1980', 'at 15 millions'), incorrect prepositions, and awkward phrasing. For instance, writing 'the fell to 13 million' contains a mechanical typo for 'then fell', and phrasing like 'began at 6 million and rose to 14 million in year 2020 by the end' exhibits structural clumsiness. These errors in grammar and punctuation occur with some frequency, but they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended data points.

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