Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph demonstrates information about the number of jobs in four sectors ( Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare) of the economy in the U.S between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is clearly noticable that in Manufacturing they had highest number of jobs but by the end of the period it declined. While healthcare had lowest number of jobs in starting but by the end of the figure it rose steadly.

In 1960,Manufacturing had maximum number of jobs in starting around 15 millions which increased by 20 millions in 1980. After that period it experienced fall with approximately 16 millions in 2000 and 14 millions in 2020.

Retail and Agriculter had similar number of jobs in 1960 (5 millions). Retail grew continously in all three years (10 millions in 1980, 14.5 millions in 2000 and 15 millions in 2020). While agriculter faced drop with 3 millions in both years 1980 and 2000, 2 millions in 2020.

Lastly, healthcare grew continously. It had only 3 millions in starting of figure after that it climbed at 5 millions in 1980 and 11 millions in 2000. After two decades it skyrocketed with 15 millions in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully covers all four economic sectors presented in the graph and provides an overview with main trends, satisfying the core requirements. Key features are reported, such as Manufacturing starting highest before declining, and Healthcare experiencing substantial growth. However, some parts of the response are under-developed or contain inaccuracies in the reported data, such as claiming Manufacturing increased by 20 millions in 1980 instead of reaching 20 million, and grouping Retail and Agriculture at 5 millions in 1960 when the visual data indicates 6 millions for both. While the overall picture is clear, greater precision in reporting specific data points and a more fully developed comparison across all years would be required to reach a higher level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The text demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a logical division into paragraphs, starting with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the specific sectors. Cohesive devices are used to signal progression and contrast, such as 'Overall', 'While', 'After that period', and 'Lastly'. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or somewhat repetitive, and referencing within sentences can feel slightly disjointed, such as in 'by the end of the figure it rose steadly'. Paragraphing is present and helps structure the response, but smoother transitions between the complex trends of different sectors would elevate the organization to the next level.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and sector-specific terms such as 'Manufacturing', 'Retail', 'Agriculture', and 'Healthcare'. There are, however, several lexical errors and inappropriate word choices, including spelling mistakes like 'noticable', 'steadly', 'Agriculter', and 'agriculter', as well as awkward phrasing like 'in starting' instead of 'at the beginning'. While these errors do not seriously impede communication, they reflect limitations in word choice, spelling, and precision that prevent the writing from achieving a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures like subordinate clauses introduced by 'While' and 'After that'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text, including missing articles ('in Manufacturing they had highest number'), preposition errors ('in starting' instead of 'at the start'), and issues with subject-verb agreement or tense consistency. Fortunately, these errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear. To reach a higher level, the writer would need to demonstrate a wider range of error-free complex structures and tighter control over articles and prepositions.

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