Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph illustrates the number of jobs in four economic sectors including manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the United States between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the employment level for healthcare and retail continued to rise over a period, whereas manufacturing rose at first but then experienced a decline. While agriculture slightly decreased in beginning but then remained stable over the period.

The number of jobs for healthcare and retail increased significantly, rose from 3 million and 6 million in 1960 to 5 million and 10 million in 1980 respectively and then surged to 16 million in 2020. Whereas manufacturing increased dramatically from 15 million to 20 million in 20 year's period, then decreased gradually and reached up to 13 million in 2020.

On the contrary, the jobs for agriculture continued to drop from 6 million in beginning to 3.5 million in 1980 then remained stable for over a period of 20 years and reached 2.5 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by selecting and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is successfully provided in the second paragraph, capturing the main general trends. However, some areas are more fully developed than others; for instance, the description of healthcare and retail tends to merge statistics together in a way that can be slightly difficult to follow, such as 'rose from 3 million and 6 million in 1960 to 5 million and 10 million in 1980 respectively and then surged to 16 million'. While the key comparisons are made, the support and data citation could be structured with greater precision to lift the response to the next level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response maintains a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from the introduction to the overview and detailed body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different categories of trends. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in transitions like 'While agriculture slightly decreased in beginning' and 'Whereas manufacturing increased'. Additionally, the referencing in sentences combining multiple sectors becomes slightly confusing due to overly compressed clauses, though the general flow remains understandable throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying numerical data and trends through words such as 'surge', 'drop', and 'stable'. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, but this is accompanied by some inaccuracy and awkward word choices, such as 'decreased in beginning' instead of 'at the beginning', and minor prepositions errors inside lexical patterns. Spelling is generally accurate, and word-choice errors do not impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended meaning easily.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and contrasting structures. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as missing articles ('in beginning') and a punctuation/possessive error ('20 year's period' instead of '20-year period'). However, these grammatical lapses rarely impede communication, and the majority of simple structures remain clear and accurate.

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