Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the details of various jobs in four domains such as manufacturing, retail,agriculture and healthcare for the development of US from 1960 to 2020. The data is calibrated in millions.

Overall, it is readily apparent that retail and healthcare sector shows an upward trend throughout the period whereas manufacturing and agriculture shows the opposite.

To begin with, the maximum jobs provided by manufacturing sector in the year 1960 which accounted for 15 millions while there were only 1 million employment in heathcare domain in the same year. In the year 1980, manufacturing sector was significantly rose to 20 million . However, it was consistently declined for 2020 which shows only 13 million job opportunities.

Analyzing further, healthcare domain was dramatically rose to 12 million jobs in the year 2000. Moreover retail and heathcare sector reached at the 16 million employment rate which ws highest in the year 2020. Additionally, agriculture shows 5 million job in the beginning of period but it was slightly fell to 3 million jobs and stay constant till 2020. Whereas, it was decreased to 2 million jobs in the last year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the main task by selecting some key features and providing an overview, but the development is somewhat uneven. The overview mentions general upward and downward trends, which is appropriate, but some of the reported data points contain inaccuracies when compared against the visual data. For instance, manufacturing jobs in 1960 are stated as 15 million (which is correct), but the text claims this was the maximum, overlooking later peaks in 1980 at 20 million. Additionally, the numbers reported for healthcare and retail in 2020 lack complete precision, and the description of agriculture contains contradictory statements regarding the figures for the final year. The student attempts comparisons, but the lack of precise data handling and slight under-development of some key trends prevent the response from achieving a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a basic organizational structure with a clear division into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, the logical progression is occasionally disrupted by confusing transitions and unclear referencing. Phrases like 'To begin with' and 'Analyzing further' are used to sequence information, but the flow between sentences can feel mechanical and abrupt. Furthermore, referencing is sometimes faulty, such as in the concluding sentences regarding agriculture where the sequence of data is muddled. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs relies on repetitive structures rather than flexible cohesive devices, leading to an overall arrangement that meets the requirements for a mid-level band.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, providing a sufficient range to describe general trends and basic data points. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'calibrated', 'upward trend', and 'employment rate', but these attempts are occasionally marred by inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form. Examples include writing 'heathcare' instead of healthcare, 'significantly rose' instead of rose significantly, and 'consistently declined for 2020'. There are also minor spelling and slip-of-the-pen errors like 'ws' instead of was. While communication is generally maintained despite these errors, the lexical control remains limited and prevents the response from reaching a higher level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to vary sentence structures with clauses introduced by 'whereas' and 'while'. However, there are frequent errors in grammar, verb forms, and prepositions throughout the text. Examples of grammatical inaccuracies include 'jobs provided by manufacturing sector' (missing article), 'manufacturing sector was significantly rose' (passive voice misuse with an intransitive verb), 'it was consistently declined' (incorrect voice), and 'agriculture shows 5 million job in the beginning' (pluralisation error). Punctuation and article errors also persist, and while these errors rarely completely impede communication, their frequency and the faulty execution of complex structures place the grammar at this band.

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