Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the stem, there is given a graph that gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

At first, we are discussing about the jobs of healthcare sector. It is seen that there were the amount of jobs beneathe 1 million in this sector in 1960. But in 2020, it crossed over 15 millions of jobs. That means people are being careful about helthcare graduallly.

Secondly, reatil jobs were over 5 millions in 1960. In 2020, it increased to above 15 millions.

Thirdly, agruculture jobs were above 5 millions in 1960. But it had been decreasing since 1960. In 2020, the number of jobs was below 1 million. The demand of it is reducing gradually.

At last, manufacturing jobs were 15 millions in 1960. It had increased to 20 millions in 1980 but it had been reducing since 1960. In 2020, the jobs were above 10 millions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response makes an attempt to present the main trends from the chart, but it only partially addresses the task requirements. The overview and selection of data are limited, and some reported figures contain inaccuracies when compared to the visual data. For example, stating that healthcare jobs were beneath 1 million in 1960 and crossed over 15 million in 2020 misses exact readings, and the explanation introduces unnecessary speculation about people being careful about healthcare gradually, which is not required in an academic report. Furthermore, the description of agriculture and manufacturing trends contains contradictory or imprecise information. To reach a higher level, the response needs to select clearer main features, provide an accurate overall summary without personal commentary, and report data more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The text demonstrates some organisation through the use of sequential transition words such as At first, Secondly, Thirdly, and At last. However, there is no clear overall progression, and the rigid reliance on conversational sequencing devices makes the structure feel mechanical rather than academically cohesive. Paragraphing is attempted by separating each economic sector into its own short block, but the progression of ideas within these paragraphs is basic and repetitive. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as using 'it' and 'they' without entirely clear antecedents. To improve cohesion and coherence, the writer should group related trends together logically and use a wider, more flexible range of cohesive devices to connect ideas smoothly without relying on formulaic numbering.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, which is adequate for a basic response but lacks the precision required for higher bands. There are several noticeable lexical errors, word-form issues, and misspellings throughout the text, such as 'reatil' instead of retail, 'agruculture' instead of agriculture, and 'helthcare' instead of healthcare. The writer attempts some basic vocabulary related to economic sectors and trends (such as 'increasing' and 'reducing'), but these attempts lack variety and sometimes feature awkward collocations. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to expand their range of vocabulary, use less common technical terms accurately, and ensure correct spelling and word formation for key terms related to data reporting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response employs a very limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple and repetitive patterns. Attempts at more complex structures or past/present tense contrasts are frequently faulty, leading to errors in verb forms and tense consistency, such as 'In the stem, there is given a graph' and 'At first, we are discussing about the jobs'. There are also issues with prepositions and articles, including 'jobs of healthcare sector' and 'the demand of it'. Frequent grammatical errors occur throughout the text, which can occasionally cause some difficulty or hesitation for the reader. To progress, the writer must incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence forms with better control over grammar, tense selection, and prepositions.

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