Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The graph shows the number of jobs in US economy sectors such as manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare in year between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, a significant increase has been observed in areas of retail and healthcare. A fluctuated trend has been seen in manufacturing sector. However, a decline is recorded in the number of jobs for agriculture department.
In year 1960, above 5 million jobs were available in retail service. This number continues to increase and reached to 10 million in 1980, 15 million and above in the year 2000 and 2020. Furthermore, the line graph for healthcare department has rised over the period, with figures around 2 million in 1960, 5 million in 1980, around 12 million in 2000 and stopped at approximately 16 million in the year 2020.
Whereas, 15 million people were serving in manufacturing area. This figure has increased to 20 million in 1980 and then faced a dramatic fall in 2000 with around 17 million jobs and even more less in 2020 (well under 15 million). Meanwhile, the recruitment in agriculture sector faced a continous decline from almost 6 million in 1960 to less than 5 million in 1980. The trend remained stable till 2000, but later reduced to about 1 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0
The response successfully covers all four sectors of the economy across the given timeframe, providing a clear overview of the main trends. Key features, such as the dramatic growth in healthcare and retail alongside the steady decline in agriculture, are correctly identified and supported with accurate data. While some comparisons are well made, there is a minor tendency to over-generalize certain trends, such as stating that retail reached 15 million and above in both 2000 and 2020 when it actually continued to rise slightly to 16 million. Overall, the task is comprehensively addressed, earning a solid score in this area.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response demonstrates a clear overall progression with a logical division of paragraphs, separating the overview from the detailed body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, though some referencing and transitions feel slightly mechanical, such as the use of 'Whereas' at the start of the final paragraph. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to structure the information about the four economic sectors, showing competence while leaving slight room for more flexible transitions to reach a higher tier.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'fluctuated trend', 'dramatic fall', and 'recruitment'. However, there are some word choice and collocation inaccuracies that prevent a higher score, such as 'manufacturing area' instead of 'manufacturing sector', 'healthcare department' instead of 'healthcare sector', and 'even more less'. Spelling is generally accurate, and vocabulary errors do not impede communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The response employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms with reasonable control over sentence structures. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as 'in year between 1960 and 2020' (missing article), 'A fluctuated trend' (incorrect participle form for 'fluctuating'), and 'line graph for healthcare department has rised' (incorrect past participle spelling). Nevertheless, these errors rarely impede communication and the majority of basic structures remain accurate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.