Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line chart illustrates the number of jobs in four different sectors,, namely manufacturing, retail, agricultural, healthcare of the economy in the US over the 60 years period.
Overall, it is clear that the number of jobs in Retail and health care sector are interested while figures in manufacturing and agricultural are decreased.
In 1960, approximately 10% of jobs increased in retailing from 6% to 16% in 2020. while the figure for healthcare dramatically increased from nearly 3% to 16%
During the period, the no of jobs in agricultural decreased from 6% to nearly 2%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response only partially addresses the task requirements and fails to meet the minimum word count of 150 words, coming in at just 95 words. While you attempt to provide an overview and report some features from the chart, your summary lacks sufficient development and detail. Furthermore, there are significant factual inaccuracies in your data reporting; for instance, you mistakenly refer to the percentages as reaching '10%' or '16%' of jobs, whereas the chart measures data in millions of jobs (reaching up to 25 million). To improve, you must ensure that you write at least the minimum word length, accurately interpret the units of measurement provided in the visual data, and extend your reporting of key trends and comparisons across all four sectors.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is some organisation evident in your writing, with a basic introduction and overview paragraph followed by body details, but the overall progression of information is limited. The response is divided into very short paragraphs, including single-sentence paragraphs, which disrupts the logical flow and development of your ideas. Cohesive devices are used minimally or inaccurately; for example, phrases like 'During the period' are acceptable, but overall referencing and transitions between sentences are weak. To reach a higher band, you need to group related information more logically, ensure a smoother progression of ideas from one paragraph to the next, and make more effective use of a wider range of cohesive devices without repetition.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You demonstrate a limited range of vocabulary that is only minimally adequate for the task. While you make some attempts at less common vocabulary related to economic sectors, such as 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agricultural', and 'healthcare', there are noticeable lexical and word-form errors, such as using 'agricultural' (an adjective) instead of 'agriculture' (a noun) in phrases like 'in manufacturing and agricultural'. Additionally, confusing terms like 'are interested' instead of 'increased' or 'grew' cause confusion for the reader. To improve your lexical score, you should focus on using correct word forms, expanding your repertoire of vocabulary to describe upward and downward trends precisely, and checking your spelling and word choice carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
Your grammar and sentence structure are characterised by a limited range of structures, with frequent errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. You attempt some complex sentence forms, but they often contain structural flaws or punctuation errors, such as the double comma in your opening sentence ('sectors,, namely') and awkward phrasing like 'approximately 10% of jobs increased in retailing from 6% to 16% in 2020. while the figure for healthcare...'. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition use within grammatical patterns. To enhance your grammatical score, you need to practise constructing accurate complex sentences, maintain better control over basic grammatical forms and punctuation, and carefully review your work for frequent errors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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