Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The line graph compares the number of employments in four sectors of the economy, namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare, in the USA from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, Manufacturing recorded the highest number in 1980 before levelling off, whereas agriculture experienced a gradual decline. By contrast, retail was in line with health care and witnessed a growth throughout the period.
The figure for manufacturing showed a significant fluctuation by reaching at 20 millions in 1980 and gradually decreasing to 13 millions by the year 2020. Jobs in retail increased significantly from 6 millions to 15 millions within 60 years. Similarly, healthcare surged from 2 millions to 15 millions, indicating a sharp rise. On the contrary, agriculture revealed a drop by reaching half of that in 1980 and stood at 3% in 2020.
It is evident that retail and healthcare topped the rank with 15 millions in 2020 while the othe two sectors are facing decrease markedly.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response successfully covers all four sectors of the economy and spans the entire 60-year period, presenting an overview that highlights the main trends such as manufacturing peaking and agriculture declining. Data is reported fairly accurately, mentioning key figures like 20 millions in 1980 for manufacturing and 15 millions for retail and healthcare in 2020. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed or contain minor inaccuracies, such as stating agriculture stood at '3%' in 2020 when the chart measures millions of jobs, and the final sentence contains imprecise rounding with 'othe two sectors'. This sits at a level where all parts of the task are addressed, but some areas lack the fully extended and supported treatment required for a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The report has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, an overview paragraph, and body paragraphs dedicated to contrasting data trends. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from detailed body points. However, cohesion sometimes feels mechanical or slightly faulty in transitions, such as the abrupt shift in the final paragraph starting with 'It is evident'. Referencing and linking phrases like 'By contrast', 'Similarly', and 'On the contrary' are present, but the logical flow between sentences occasionally stumbles, preventing the response from achieving a smoother progression of ideas.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating topic-specific terms like 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare', alongside useful reporting verbs and nouns such as 'fluctuation', 'decline', and 'surged'. Less common lexical items are attempted, but there are notable word choice and phrasing errors that prevent a higher score, such as using 'employments' instead of 'employment' or 'jobs', and adding an unnecessary plural in '20 millions' and '6 millions'. Spelling is generally accurate, and these lexical slips do not impede overall communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
A mix of simple and complex sentence forms is attempted, such as 'The line graph compares...' and clauses involving relative or contrasting ideas. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including preposition and particle misuse like 'reaching at 20 millions', a missing article in 'health care', and a typographical error in the final sentence ('othe two sectors'). Nevertheless, these grammatical errors are fairly limited and rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended meaning easily.
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