Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The accompanying graph depicts the data about vocational ratios across four categories over a period of 60 years in the USA.

Overall, the manufacturing sector had the highest proportion of jobs in the USA, while the retail jobs ranked in second place. However, the agriculture sector had the sole exception with fewer number of jobs among all categories.

To begin with, the manufacturing department had 15 million vocations in 1960 but by 1980, it surged to 20 million and later, it illustrated a persistently decline trend and reached 13 million jobs in 2020. Secondly, the retail sector depicted consistently an upward trend, began from 6 million and ended up at 15 milllion jobs prospects in 2020.

In addition, Healthcare also had continuously an upward trend, beginning from 3 million jobs and after 4 decades; it showed above 10 million jobs and later, illustrated 15 million vocations in 2020. Finally, the agriculture sector experienced a conspicuously decline trend until 1980 and later it revealed constant trend with a little bit fluctuation. It started from 6 million and ended up at 3 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task and provides an overview, but some features are under-developed or inaccurately described. While the general trends of manufacturing and retail are noted, the overview contains minor inaccuracies, such as stating that manufacturing had the highest proportion throughout when retail and healthcare surpassed it by 2020. Furthermore, some data points are misreported or vaguely supported; for instance, the agriculture sector is described as starting at 6 million and ending at 3 million, but the chart indicates it began at 6 million in 1960 and dropped to 2 or 3 million by 1980, remaining low thereafter. Main trends are identified, but greater precision in reporting key figures and a clearer overview would lift this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response demonstrates a clear overall arrangement with logical paragraphing, dividing the introduction, overview, and specific body paragraphs effectively. Progression is generally maintained through sequencing signals such as 'To begin with', 'In addition', and 'Finally'. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or repetitive, and referencing within sentences can feel slightly awkward, such as in the transitions between data points. To move closer to higher band levels, cohesive devices could be used more flexibly and fluidly rather than relying on standard formulaic connectors, and referencing across sentences could be handled with greater precision.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'vocations', 'surge', and 'fluctuation'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation inaccuracies that reveal a lack of precision, such as using 'vocations' instead of 'jobs' or 'positions', and 'persistently decline trend' instead of 'persistent downward trend'. Spelling is generally acceptable, and communication is not impeded, but these lexical slips and awkward word formations prevent the response from achieving a higher band score. Developing greater control over collocations and word forms will significantly strengthen this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writing displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to vary grammatical structures. However, there are some noticeable errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly with verb tenses, word order, and prepositions within structures, such as 'depicted consistently an upward trend', 'began from', and 'conspicuously decline trend'. Despite these errors, the structures used do not impede communication, and the meaning remains clear throughout. To improve, the student needs to exercise tighter control over tense consistency and adverb placement in complex clauses.

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