Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given graph give information about saveral jobs in economy sector in USA from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it describe about the inrormation of four economy sectors like manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and about healthcare, that the jobs in millions.
In one hand, in 1960, job of manufacturing is recorded to 15 millions which goes upto 20 millions in 1980 which increased rapidly, but after this, it decreased upto 17 millions in 2000, beside it it continously goes down upto 13 millions in 2020. Furthermore, there are 6 millions of jobs were in 1960, which grows to 10 millions in 1980, and 15 millions in 2000, and continously goes up to 16 millions in 2020.
On other hand, in 1960, there are 2 millions of jobs in healthcare, which goes upside to 5 millions in 1980, and 11 millions in 2000, and reached to 16 millions in 2020. Rather than it, jobs of agriculture are 5 millio
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response attempts to address the task by reporting information about the four economic sectors, but the approach remains partial and fragmented, particularly as the text cuts off abruptly mid-sentence at the end. While some main features are noted, such as the peak of manufacturing jobs at 20 million in 1980, the overview is overly repetitive and lacks clarity. Key comparisons between sectors are largely absent, and the description of data trends is hindered by inaccuracies and underdeveloped ideas. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to provide a clear, well-developed overview, ensure all parts of the chart are fully covered without abrupt truncation, and integrate meaningful comparisons across the entire time period.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response shows some basic organization with introductory and body paragraphs, but there is a lack of clear overall progression. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate, such as "In one hand", "beside it", and "Rather than it". Paragraphing is attempted, but the logical flow between sentences and ideas is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and the incomplete conclusion. To improve cohesion, the writer should use standard linking phrases correctly and ensure that information is sequenced in a way that guides the reader smoothly through the comparison of trends rather than listing data points in a disjointed manner.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms and phrases such as "goes up", "goes down", and "jobs". There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word formations, including "inrormation", "saveral", and "economy sector" instead of "economic sectors". Less common vocabulary is attempted with frequent inaccuracies, which can cause some difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to expand their range of vocabulary by incorporating precise synonyms for trends and data reporting, and improve control over word choice, collocations, and spelling.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple sentences with frequent errors in complex forms. There are notable grammatical mistakes throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement errors like "The given graph give", missing articles, and incorrect prepositions or verb tenses, such as "job of manufacturing is recorded" and "there are 2 millions of jobs". These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader. To progress, the writer must work on basic grammatical accuracy, improve control over tense consistency when describing past data, and develop greater variety and accuracy in sentence construction.
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