Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The rendered line graph illustrate the information about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the us economy, namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare, between 1960 and 2020.
overall, manufacturing had the highest number of jobs for most of the period, although it experienced a decline after 1980. In contrast, healthcare and retail showed an overall upward trend, while employment in agriculture decreased considerably.
In 1960, manufacturing provided approxiamately 15 millon jobs, compared with around 6 million in retail and agriculture. healthcare had the lowest figure, at about 2 million. manufacturing employment then rose to almost 20 million in 1980, before falling to 16 million in 2000 and approximately 12 million in 2020.
Retail employment
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, stopping abruptly at 109 words with an unfinished sentence about retail employment. As a result, the task is addressed only partially, as the discussion of the data for retail and healthcare in the later decades is incomplete. While the introduction adequately paraphrases the prompt and the overview correctly identifies the main general trends (such as manufacturing peaking and then declining while healthcare and retail rose), the under-developed body paragraphs and truncated ending mean key data comparisons for the final years are missing. To achieve a higher band, the student must ensure the response is completed in full, providing all necessary figures and comparisons across the entire time period.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response demonstrates a clear overall arrangement with logical progression from an introduction to an overview and into the body details. Paragraphing is appropriately handled, and basic cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as "In contrast" and "then rose to". However, the sudden cutoff at the end leaves the text disjointed and incomplete, which affects the overall flow and structural completeness of the writing. Referencing and progression are generally clear in the parts that are finished, but to move to a higher band, the student must maintain a steady, cohesive flow right through to a fully formed conclusion without abrupt endings.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully employing topic-specific terms like "manufacturing", "retail", "agriculture", and "healthcare". The student also attempts less common vocabulary and descriptive phrases such as "overall upward trend" and "decreased considerably". There are, however, a few minor spelling and capitalization errors, such as "approxiamately", "millon", and the lowercase starts at the beginning of sentences ("overall", "healthcare"). These lexical slips and spelling inaccuracies do not impede communication, placing the response comfortably within the mid-range. To reach a higher band, a wider variety of precise vocabulary should be used with consistent spelling and strict adherence to sentence capitalization.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5
The response features a workable mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over past tense narrative structures for reporting graph data (e.g., "provided approxiamately 15 millon jobs, compared with around 6 million"). There are some grammatical and punctuation errors present, such as missing capitalisation at the start of sentences and incomplete phrasing, but these errors rarely impede the reader's understanding. To progress to a higher band, the student needs to incorporate a wider variety of complex structures with greater accuracy and eliminate basic punctuation and capitalisation oversights.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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