Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the economy sectors of US from 1960 to 2020. Years are taken from 1960 to 2020 along x-axis.Whereas, Jobs are taken along y-axis.
Overall, The information of four sectors of economy are given in the line graph.Job range is between 2 to 20 millions.Four different sectors are compared by using four different lines. The economy sectors explained in the graph are Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture and Healthcare.
No of jobs in the manufacturing sector of economy was 15 million in 1960. It increased to 20 millions in 1980 but decreased drastically to 12 millions in 2020.
No of jobs in retail sector was 5 milllions initially and increased to 15 millions in 2020.While,No of jobs in agriculture sector was 5 million initially and decreased to 2 million in 2020.
No of jobs in healthcare sectors started from 2 millions and increased dramatically to 15 million in 2020.
In short, These four trends are shown by this line graph.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You attempted to cover the main features of the line graph regarding the four employment sectors in the US from 1960 to 2020. However, your overview is weak and repetitive, consisting largely of mechanical descriptions of the axes and visual mechanics rather than summarising the broader trends. Furthermore, some of your data reporting is imprecise or inaccurate compared to the visual data; for example, you state that manufacturing jobs decreased to '12 millions in 2020' when the graph shows approximately 13 million, and you misreport the initial values for the retail and agriculture sectors. Because your ideas are somewhat limited, your overview is poorly synthesised, and key details contain inaccuracies, the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
Your response demonstrates some organisation with basic paragraphing and mechanical transitions like 'Overall,' and 'In short,'. However, there is no clear overall progression of ideas, and the sequencing feels disjointed because you dedicate isolated, repetitive sentences to each individual sector without effectively linking or comparing them. Cohesive devices are used mechanically and sometimes inaccurately, and your referencing is repetitive, with multiple sentences starting monotonously with 'No of jobs in...'. To improve, you need to group related information logically, use a wider variety of cohesive ties, and ensure smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
Your vocabulary range is limited and minimally adequate for the task. You rely heavily on repetitive, basic phrasing such as 'No of jobs', 'economy sectors', and 'initially and increased/decreased to'. There are also lexical and spelling inaccuracies, such as omitting apostrophes in abbreviations ('No') and awkward phrasing like 'economy sectors of US' instead of 'sectors of the US economy'. You attempt a few less common words like 'drastically' and 'dramatically', but overall, your vocabulary lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands, and these noticeable errors cause some distraction for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You display a limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple sentences and repetitive subject-verb patterns. Your attempts at more complex structures are restricted. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing articles ('the US', 'along the x-axis'), incorrect prepositions ('from 1960 to 2020 along x-axis'), and punctuation issues such as missing spaces after periods and incorrect comma placement before conjunctions. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader and demonstrate a lack of control over basic grammatical forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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