Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors(in millions) of the US economy-manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare over a peiod of 60 years from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, there is change in all job opennings from four different sectors from 1960 to 2020. Initially, manufacturing had created more number of oppurtunies while agriculture got decreased over the period.
Looking at the detail, manufacturing was the top most leading sector in hiring new employees around 15 million jobs at 1960 and that rose to peak at 20 milllion jobs at 1980. After that along with the time the opennings reduced upto 13 million in 2020. While retail sector was the most bomming section where the job opprtunites rose from 6 million to 16 million over the 60 years.
However, the job in heathcare was steadily increased from 3 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020. Finally, the agriculture created 6 million jobs in 1960 but got decreased over the period to 3 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by selecting and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors over the sixty-year period. An overview is provided, noting the general changes in job openings. Key data points are accurately reported, such as manufacturing reaching its peak in 1980 and healthcare and retail rising significantly. However, some aspects are slightly under-developed or lack complete extension. For instance, the description of retail and healthcare trends could have been integrated more thoroughly with comparative commentary to fully reach a higher tier of task response. Overall, the core requirements are met satisfactorily, providing a clear summary of the visual data.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The report demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at logical organisation. Information is divided into logical paragraphs, starting with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the specific sectors. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall', 'Initially', 'Looking at the detail', and 'However', which help guide the reader through the data. Nevertheless, cohesion sometimes feels a bit mechanical, and referencing between sentences could be smoother. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to structure the response, but transitions between ideas occasionally lack seamless integration. Progression is visible throughout, though it falls short of the consistent, flexible flow required for higher bands.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items related to economic trends, such as 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies, awkward word choices, and spelling errors throughout the text, including 'opennings' instead of openings, 'oppurtunies' and 'opprtunites' instead of opportunities, 'bomming' instead of booming, and 'heathcare' instead of healthcare. Collocations and word forms are occasionally strained, such as 'job opennings from four different sectors' or 'manufacturing had created more number of oppurtunies'. These errors do not seriously impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score due to recurring inaccuracies in spelling and word choice.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like subordinate clauses and passive-like constructions. There are some grammatical errors and issues with articles, prepositions, and verb forms, such as 'there is change in all job opennings' instead of changes, 'while agriculture got decreased' where 'decreased' is used intransitively with an auxiliary, and 'at 1960' instead of in 1960. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and despite the presence of grammatical errors, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended meaning. The control over grammar is adequate, showing a reasonable variety of sentence patterns for this level.
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