Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four economic sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that the number of employment in retail and healthcare increased substantially over the period, while in agricultural sector declined considerably. Meanwhile, employment in manufacturing sector experienced a rise before falling gradually to the end of the period. However, retail and healthcare sectors had the highest employemnt whereas agriculture had by far the lowest.

In 1960, employment in agriculture stood at approximately 6 millions, before falling sharply to around 2,5 millions in 1980. This figures then remained relatively stable until 2000, before declining further to roughly 2 million by 2020. Retail, by contrast, experienced steady growth. the figure rose from around 6 millions in 1960 to 10 millions in 1980. Then it continue to increase, reaching about 15 millions in 2000, before rising slightly to 15,5 million in 2020.

Manufacturing employment accounted for 15 million in 1960. Then the figure climbed considerably to 20 millions in 1980. The figure then subsequently decline to about 17 millions in 2000 and continued to decline further, recording roughly 13 millions of jobs. However, Healthcare sector followed opposite pattern. Employment witnessed a sharp rise, rising from around 2 millions in 1960 to 5 millions in 1980, and to 15 millions in 2000. By 2020, the figure had increased slightly to 15.5 millions, reaching the same

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response satisfies the requirements by covering all parts of the task well. The overview clearly highlights the main trends, noting the upward trajectory in retail and healthcare alongside the downward trends in agriculture and manufacturing. Key features are accurately reported with correct figures from the visual data, such as retail and healthcare reaching 15 and 16 million respectively, and agriculture dropping to around 2 million. The comparison between sectors is also effectively drawn out. However, to move closer to the highest bands, the final sentence of the conclusion is cut off mid-thought, leaving a minor omission in the final data point reporting. Nonetheless, the core information is well-extended and supported throughout the main body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response demonstrates a clear overall progression with a logical arrangement of information. The introductory paragraph sets the context, followed by an overview paragraph, and then detailed body paragraphs dividing the sectors logically. Cohesive devices are employed to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Meanwhile', 'In 1960', and 'Retail, by contrast'. However, some elements of cohesion feel a bit mechanical or repetitive in their transitional phrasing. Furthermore, referencing is occasionally slightly loose, and paragraphing could be tighter, particularly as the final paragraph cuts off abruptly without fully resolving the comparative data. Overall, the organizational structure is coherent and easy to follow, successfully meeting the criteria for a solid performance.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The student displays an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items related to economic trends, such as 'substantially', 'considerable', and 'fluctuated'. Word choice is generally appropriate, though there are a few minor inaccuracies and slip-ups in phrasing, such as 'the number of employment' instead of 'the level of employment' and 'employemnt' (spelling error). Other minor slips include 'this figures' instead of 'these figures' and 'decline' used in the past tense without the correct suffix ('decline' instead of 'declined'). These vocabulary and spelling errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the writing from achieving greater precision and flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied structures such as prepositional time clauses and comparative transitions. There is a mixture of error-free sentences alongside some grammatical errors. Examples of errors include numerical pluralisation slips like '6 millions' instead of '6 million', '2,5 millions', and '15.5 millions'. Additionally, there are minor subject-verb agreement and tense consistency issues, such as 'Then it continue to increase' instead of 'continued'. Punctuation and sentence boundary issues occasionally appear, and the abrupt ending of the final sentence highlights minor structural control issues. These errors rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to grasp the intended meaning clearly.

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