Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph comapres the proportion of number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall,in the two economic sectors marked as healthcare centre and retail sector shown a rigorous ascend in number of jobs from 1960 to 2020. However, in the other two economic factors marked as manufacturing and agriculture sector, jobs has shown decline from 1960 till 2020.
It is evident from the graph that jobs in agricultural sector held at 6 million ratio in 1960 shown constant decline till 2020 . On the contrast, the retail sector with intial job market ratio at 6 million shown continuos increase. Along with that the healthcare economic sector has shown a continous peak of job ratio from 1960 till 2020. Moreover, manufacturing business had already 15 million jobs numbers in 1960 took a peak of jobs ascend in 1980 and then began to decline continuosly till 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response attempts to address the task by reporting the main trends for all four sectors shown in the line graph, providing an overview and some key figures. However, the response falls short of the 150-word minimum length requirement, containing only 139 words. Furthermore, some of the data points and descriptions are partially inaccurate or imprecise, such as describing the agricultural sector as held at a '6 million ratio' in 1960 and misinterpreting the vertical axis representation by referring to 'proportion of number of jobs'. Key trends are mentioned, but the development of these ideas remains limited due to the brevity and occasional lack of clarity in reporting specifics.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response presents some organisation through the use of an introductory sentence, an overview paragraph, and detailed body sentences, but there is a lack of clear overall progression. Cohesive devices are used mechanically and sometimes inaccurately, such as 'On the contrast' instead of 'In contrast', and 'Along with that'. Referencing and logical connections between sentences occasionally feel abrupt, and paragraphing is underdeveloped, as the detailed points are bundled together in a single block rather than structured logically by trends or time periods.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey the basic trends in the graph. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'rigorous ascend' and 'continuous peak', but these phrases suffer from awkward collocations and word choice errors. There are also spelling errors like 'comapres' and 'intial', alongside repetitive use of terms like 'sector', 'ratio', and 'jobs'. While these lexical inadequacies do not completely obscure the message, they cause noticeable difficulty for the reader and prevent the response from achieving a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer demonstrates a limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic subject-verb-object patterns. Attempts at more complex sentences are frequently faulty, marred by missing articles, incorrect prepositions, and grammatical errors such as 'healthcare centre and retail sector shown a rigorous ascend' (missing subjects or incorrect verb forms) and 'jobs has shown decline'. Frequent errors in tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and punctuation occur throughout the text, causing distraction and difficulty for the reader.
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