Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph shows the number of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agricultural, and healthcare from 1960 to 2020 in united states. The x axis shows the years and y axis shows jobs in millions.

Jobs in manufacturing show growth for 2 decades from 1960-80 creating highest of 20 millions jobs. Later it declined to 10 and half million in 2020. The retail and healthcare sector show an upward trend overall growing with every decad while bothh hitting the same number in 2020. Lastly Agriculture sector showed a downward trend over the years while starting from slightly above 5 millons in 1960 till hitting 2.5 millions job in the sector.

The comparison shows that manufacturing and agricultural showed a downward trend after 1980 becase more and more job are replaced by the devlopment in technology and machines are get more n more sophisticated over time.

In conclusion, healthcare and reatail are leading the chart and both showing an upward trends.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully covers all parts of the prompt by selecting and reporting the main trends and features across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. You correctly identified that manufacturing peaked in 1980 before declining, and that healthcare and retail showed an overall upward trend. However, your ideas are somewhat unevenly developed. For instance, the agricultural sector's data is described in a slightly confused manner ("slightly above 5 millons in 1960 till hitting 2.5 millions job"), which misreads the starting point of 6 million and the final point of 2 million. Furthermore, the final paragraph introduces outside explanation regarding technology and machinery, which is not strictly presented in the chart and detracts slightly from objective reporting. To reach a higher band, ensure all data points are accurately read and avoid bringing in unsupported external assumptions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

Your response maintains a coherent overall arrangement and follows a logical structure, moving from an introductory overview to body paragraphs detailing specific sectors and concluding with a summary. Paragraphing is used to separate your thoughts, which helps guide the reader. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. For instance, transitional phrases between sentences can feel abrupt, and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the pronoun use in "while bothh hitting the same number". To improve, you should employ a wider range of cohesive devices more smoothly and ensure that relationships between sentences and paragraphs are explicitly signalled without relying on repetitive structures.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common terms such as "manufacturing", "decline", and "upward trend". However, there are noticeable lexical errors and spelling mistakes throughout the text, including "agricultural" (used as a noun instead of agriculture), "decad", "bothh", and "millons". Additionally, some word choices are imprecise or non-standard, such as "leading the chart". These errors do not completely impede communication, but they restrict your score because they reveal a lack of precise control over less common lexical items. To achieve a higher band, you need to expand your vocabulary range, use collocations more accurately, and carefully proofread to eliminate basic spelling slips.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

Your writing displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating that you can construct multi-clause sentences such as "Jobs in manufacturing show growth for 2 decades from 1960-80 creating highest of 20 millions jobs." However, there are some noticeable errors in grammar, articles, and pluralisation, such as "creating highest of 20 millions jobs" (missing articles and incorrect pluralisation), "are get more n more sophisticated", "retail and healthcare sector show" (subject-verb agreement), and "becase more and more job are replaced". While these errors rarely impede overall communication, they occur regularly enough to prevent you from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on mastering subject-verb agreement, accurate article usage, and ensuring that all verbs in complex structures are correctly formed.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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