Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

in the chart it shows 4 diffrent types of sector which are related to the US economy since 1960 to 2020.in the beginging of the 1960 manufacturing companies has the most opportunities for the poeple ,it was around 15 millions meanwhile it decreased slowly after the 1980 where it goes downword to and lost healthcare and agriculture in between 2020.

retail jobs icreased gradually and crossed 15 millions and maintainted with healthcare job seekers too.in the beginging of the mid 60s there has alot of crowd for the grabbing opportunity in agrculture fieldbut after the the employees lest the job becouse of the growth in future.acording to my perception retailers and agriculture feild maintain their value for the better aconomy in the united state of america .every secter played vital role in the economy of the state but some of them lost their values and some of them mainained the value and scored good at last.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response makes an attempt to address the prompt by mentioning some trends from the chart, but it only partially covers the data. The overview is weak and includes personal opinions ('according to my perception retailers and agriculture feild maintain their value...'), which is inappropriate for an academic task report. Some key features are inaccurately described or difficult to follow, such as the statement regarding manufacturing going down towards healthcare and agriculture. To move to a higher band, you need to provide a clear, objective overview of the main trends without personal commentary, ensure all selected data points are accurate, and make meaningful comparisons across the four sectors throughout the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The text suffers from poor organization and a lack of clear paragraphing, as it is written as a single, dense block of text with no distinct introduction, body, or conclusion. There is no clear overall progression of ideas, and cohesive devices are either absent, repetitive, or inaccurate ('in the beginging', 'meanwhile', 'after the the'). Referencing is also confusing at times, making it hard for the reader to follow the flow of information. To improve, you should structure your writing into clear paragraphs (an introduction/overview followed by body paragraphs), use a wider range of appropriate cohesive links, and ensure that ideas follow a logical sequence from start to finish.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with several noticeable spelling and word choice errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader (e.g., 'diffrent', 'beginging', 'downword', 'icreased', 'maintainted', 'agrculture', 'lest', 'becouse', 'acording', 'feild', 'aconomy', 'secter'). While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary such as 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare', the limited range and frequent errors restrict the score. To achieve a higher band, you need to expand your lexical repertoire, use precise vocabulary to describe statistical changes (e.g., verbs and adverbs like 'rose gradually' or 'declined significantly'), and carefully check your spelling before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There is a very limited range of sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences are often faulty or incomplete. You make frequent grammatical errors regarding verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions (e.g., 'manufacturing companies has the most opportunities', 'it was around 15 millions', 'there has alot of crowd'). Punctuation is also poorly handled, with missing spaces after periods and commas. To improve this area, you need to focus on mastering basic sentence structures, ensuring correct verb tenses for past data, and eliminating frequent errors by reviewing your work for punctuation and agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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