Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given graph illustrates information about the number of jobs in four categories of the economy in the United States between the years 1960 and 2020.
It is very evident that manufacturing sector surged in the beginning years comparatively to the other categories. Conversely, agriculture declined drastically up to1980, then it continued to be the least profitable economy sector till 2020. Retail increased all the years from 1960 to 2020, followed by the healthcare sector showing an increase in economy of the US till the year 2020. Moreover, economy level of manufacturing sector decreased dramatically from 1980 till 2020. Furthermore, Categories i.e, healthcare and retail showed a marginally similar results in the economy growth in the recent years.
In conclusion, retail and healthcare sectors increased maximally over the passing years, with the manufacturing sector that grew initially and later on declined. In addition to this, agricukture showed the least growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response meets the task partially, partly due to falling short of the 150-word minimum at 142 words. While the main features of the graph are identified, such as the initial surge in manufacturing and the steady growth of retail and healthcare, some parts are underdeveloped or inaccurately described. For instance, referring to sectors as parts of the 'profitable economy' or 'economy level' reflects a minor confusion in data interpretation, as the graph measures the number of jobs in millions rather than financial profitability. The overview provided in the conclusion captures general trends, but the limited development of key comparisons prevents the response from reaching a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has some overall organisation with a discernible introduction, body, and conclusion, but progression is occasionally hindered by mechanical or repetitive cohesive devices. Transitions such as 'Conversely', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore' are attempted, but referencing and linking feel somewhat forced rather than naturally flowing. Paragraphing is present, though the body is compressed into a single block of text rather than being logically broken down by trends or time periods, which limits clarity in sequencing.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with an attempt to use less common items such as 'surged', 'drastically', and 'minimally similar'. However, there are noticeable word-choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as describing job sectors as 'profitable economy sector' or referring to 'economy level of manufacturing'. There is also a spelling error ('agricukture'), though overall communication is not severely impeded. To improve, the student should ensure precise terminology related to statistical graphs rather than mixing economic terms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside a few attempts at complex forms that often contain errors. There are issues with prepositions and articles, such as 'manufacturing sector surged in the beginning years comparatively to the other categories' and 'agriculture declined drastically up to1980' (missing a space). Frequent minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing can cause some difficulty for the reader, keeping the control of grammar at this level.
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