Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the information about the quantity of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the number jobs in retail and healthcare sectors significantly increased, while manufacturing and agriculture sectores decreased steadily over the periode of time.

In 1960, healthcare jobs were under 5 millions, and retail jobs were over 5 millions, and after one decades, healthcare market touched 5 millions, while retail market was doubled. After two decades, retail and healthcare both job markets rose significantly and crossed over 15 millions.

In 1960, manufacturing job market was at 15 millions, and after 10 years it touched its peak at 20 million which was the bigest job market. After highest growth, manufacturing market lost its possition and dropped down under 15 million, while agriculture job market dropped its possition from over 5 million to under 5 million over the periode of time respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully covers all four economic sectors shown in the graph and includes an overall trend description alongside specific data points. The overview notes the upward trends in retail and healthcare and the downward trends in manufacturing and agriculture. However, some aspects of the task are developed less fully than others. For example, the detailed body paragraphs contain several minor inaccuracies or imprecise descriptions regarding the timeline and specific figures, such as stating that healthcare jobs were 'under 5 millions' in 1960 when the chart shows them at approximately 2 million. The selection of data is generally relevant, but the lack of precision in reporting the dates and figures prevents the response from achieving a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response maintains a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from an introductory sentence to an overview and subsequent body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used to separate the different sectors logically. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty due to awkward temporal transitions like 'after one decades' and repetitive sentence openings. Reference pronouns and linking words are used to guide the reader through the data, but referencing is occasionally unclear, which prevents the essay from flowing as smoothly as required for higher band levels.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying basic economic trends and sector names. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'significantly increased', 'touched its peak', and 'lost its possition', but these attempts are occasionally marred by spelling errors like 'sectores', 'periode', 'bigest', and 'possition'. Word choice is generally functional, but vocabulary control lacks the precision needed to fully express the nuances of the visual data without minor slips.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an ability to combine clauses using conjunctions such as 'while' and 'and'. There are, however, several grammatical errors throughout the text, including article omissions and pluralisation issues like 'the number jobs', 'after one decades', and 'both job markets'. While these errors in grammar and punctuation are noticeable, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended data comparisons without significant confusion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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