Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given graph shows about variation in job numbers in different sections in US. According to the graph in industrial zone moderate increase in number of jobs from 15 to 20 in production from 1960 to 1980, after their is gradual decline at the end of 2020. If we investigate the field of retail it has been observed rise constantly until 2000 that number reaches at 15 afterward their direction of rising upward slightly increase. After 2000 their is fall in product market with parallel steady increase in retail sector. From 1960 their is no prgressive approch as compared to other three zone. It has been seen that it go down upto 1980 in agriculture field, A flatten line of decrease observed up to 2020. In healthcare zone line depicted continous boost in number as year passing untill now their number of jobs meets retail department. overall graph illustrate their increase in jobs from start to now in agriculture and healthcare zone, while Manufacturing and Agriculture field constantly in decline direction

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response makes an attempt to address the prompt by reporting on the number of jobs across the four sectors, but it only partially covers the data. While some main features are mentioned, such as the trends in healthcare and manufacturing, key details are confused or inaccurately stated, for instance claiming that agriculture and healthcare both saw an increase in jobs from start to now when agriculture clearly declined. Furthermore, the overview is imprecise and contains contradictory statements. The ideas are limited and under-developed, lacking a clear, well-supported summary of the most prominent features in the graph. To reach higher bands, you must ensure that all major trends are accurately reported without factual contradictions and that your overview clearly highlights the overall differences and trajectories of the sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response shows some organization in attempting to describe different sectors sequentially, but it lacks clear overall progression and logical structure. There are no proper paragraphs, resulting in a single dense block of text that is difficult to follow. Cohesive devices are frequently inadequate, inaccurate, or repetitive, with awkward transitional phrases like 'If we investigate the field' and 'after their direction' appearing clunky. Referencing is also not always clear, making it hard to follow which sector or time period is being discussed. To improve, you need to structure your essay into clear paragraphs—an introduction with an overview, followed by well-grouped body paragraphs—and use a wider, more accurate range of cohesive markers to guide the reader smoothly through the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical resource is limited and minimally adequate for the task. You attempt some less common vocabulary such as 'gradual decline', 'steady increase', and 'continuous boost', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling, such as 'prgressive approch', 'continous', and using 'product market' instead of production or manufacturing. Additionally, there are awkward collocations like 'direction of rising upward slightly increase'. These lexical inaccuracies and spelling errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and obscure the precise reporting of the data. To achieve a higher score, you should focus on using precise vocabulary related to data trends and ensure your spelling and word forms are accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences with frequent errors when attempting more complex formulations. There are numerous grammatical inaccuracies throughout the text, including missing prepositions, incorrect verb forms ('after their is gradual decline', 'it go down upto 1980'), and poor punctuation that leads to run-on phrasing. Errors in subject-verb agreement and article usage are also frequent. These persistent errors often cause difficulty for the reader and impede smooth communication. To improve, you need to practice forming grammatically sound complex sentences, pay closer attention to verb tenses appropriate for past data, and ensure careful proofreading of basic grammatical patterns and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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