Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors namely the manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the figures of retail and healthcare increased over the period, whereas manufacturing and agriculture experienced a decline. It is also noticeable that retail and healthcare both sections recorded the highest figure by the end of the period, while agriculture had the lowerst.

At the beginning of the period, the figure of healthcare stood at 2 million jobs. It's then increased significatly to 11 million in 2000 and finally reaching almost 16 million by the end of the period. Similarly retail experienced an upward trend, rising from 10 million in 1980 to 15 million in 2000.Then reaching 16 million by the end of the period.

Meanwhile, manufacturing experienced a downward trend over the period. It's figure stood at 15 million at the beginning of the period. It's then surged to 20 million in 1980. before decresed significatly to 17 million 2000 and finally reaching 14 million in 2020. However manufacturing had highest figure among the three sectors at the beginning of the period. Then manufacturing had lowest figure by end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors mentioned in the prompt, but the information is sometimes reported inaccurately or lacks sufficient extension. For instance, the student states that retail started at 10 million in 1980, completely missing the 1960 data point of 6 million, and incorrectly notes that retail reached 16 million in 2000 (whereas the chart shows it at roughly 15 million). Furthermore, the overview is rather basic, noting general increases and decreases without highlighting the most significant trends comprehensively. To move to a higher level, you should ensure all key data points are accurately reported from the chart and provide a more thorough overview of the overall trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic overall structure with paragraphing used to separate the introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, progression is somewhat disjointed and mechanical. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or awkward, such as starting sentences with 'It's then increased significatly' and abrupt transitions between ideas. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in the phrasing 'both sections recorded' or 'It's figure'. To improve, you should aim for smoother logical transitions between sentences and paragraphs, using cohesive devices more naturally without repetitive structures.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, attempting some less common words related to data trends such as 'surged', 'downward trend', and 'upward trend'. However, there are noticeable spelling errors ('significatly', 'decresed', 'lowerst') and occasional awkward word choices or phrasing, such as referring to economic sectors as 'sections'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they restrict the vocabulary score. To progress, focus on eliminating spelling mistakes and expanding your range of precise vocabulary for describing economic data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The essay displays a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic subject-verb patterns. When complex structures are attempted, they frequently contain errors, particularly regarding verb forms, tense consistency, and punctuation. Examples include 'It's then increased significatly' (incorrect use of contraction for possessive 'its' and mixing tense/aspect), 'before decresed significatly to 17 million 2000' (missing preposition and incorrect verb form), and run-on phrasing. Frequent grammatical errors require some effort from the reader to parse the meaning. To achieve a higher band, you must improve your control over verb tenses, prepositions, and sentence punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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