Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates about the number of jobs in four sectors of economy of the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the jobs in both the retail and healthcare sector rose significantly over the period. While there was a steady decline in the agriculture jobs, the number of jobs in the manufacturing sector decreased slightly.

The number of jobs in retail sector increased moderately from around 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980. The period between 1980 and 2020 experienced a substantial rise in the number of jobs, which went up from 10 million to just above 15 million. Between 1960 and 2020, there was a sharp climb in the number of jobs in the healthcare sector, that surged from approximately 2 million to just above 15 million.

The jobs in the agriculture sector showed a gradual decline from just 6 million in 1960 to around 2 million by 2020. In contrast, the manufacturing jobs experienced some fluctuations, rising from 15 million in 1960 to 20 million in 1980 before falling to around 14 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features and trends of the four economic sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020. You have provided a clear overview that captures the general upward trends in retail and healthcare alongside the differing trajectories in agriculture and manufacturing. The key data points, such as the peak of manufacturing jobs in 1980 and the dramatic surge in healthcare, are well selected and supported by figures from the chart. To reach a higher band, some of the descriptions could be extended with more precise comparative analysis, such as contrasting the growth rates of retail and healthcare more directly across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

Your writing has a clear overall progression and logical arrangement, with information grouped sensibly into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs dedicated to specific sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'While there was', 'Between 1960 and 2020', and 'In contrast' are used effectively to link ideas and guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different trends. To achieve a higher level of cohesion, you could ensure that referencing and transitions feel slightly more seamless, avoiding any mechanical repetition in how sentences are introduced.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate and generally appropriate range of vocabulary for this task, successfully employing words and phrases such as 'steady decline', 'moderate increase', 'substantial rise', and 'fluctuations'. Less common lexical items are attempted with some success, though there is a minor collocation slip in the introduction where you wrote 'sectors of economy' instead of 'sectors of the economy'. Spelling and word choice are generally accurate and do not impede communication. To move up to a higher band, incorporate a wider variety of sophisticated vocabulary and ensure every collocation is natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The response features a good mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating your ability to handle relative clauses and subordinate structures. You maintain good control over tense usage when describing past trends from 1960 to 2020. However, there is a minor intrusion in the opening sentence where you wrote 'illustrates about', which is grammatically incorrect. Other minor punctuation or article slips occur, but they are infrequent and do not impede communication, leaving the majority of your sentences error-free. To reach the next level, you should aim for greater grammatical consistency and a wider variety of complex structures deployed without minor prepositing errors.

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